Who do you blame for your misery???

Actually, thats quite a shortcut, blaming somebody else for our plight. We spend more time trying to find somebody to blame things on, than trying to find a solution to the problem.
But does that help...wouldn't it help to look within???

I have been blaming too many people in my team for being unprofessional, due to few such people the work pressure has been ever increasing. But the fact is I haven't been working too hard to find a solution to it either. Neither did I give it all to change the attitude of the people around, nor did I try to find a way to escape all of it by finding myself a new job. So, who do I have to blame...nobody but myself.
Introspect always helps...it drives you to find solutions.
But somehow I find this to be a rare practice among others. While I always tend to blame myself for most of my problems, most of the time I come across people who always try to find others to blame.

So how does it feel when somebody holds you responsible for his/her misery...
Fortunately or unfortunately, I wouldn't know...I somehow find no pleasure by being rude, or giving tension to others. So most of the time, I'd take pain myself, just because I don't want to pass it to others. But you know...I have been enough such phases in life where I realized that going out of your way to help others actually doesn't help. Someday, it has to come to an end...and when it does, all the good that you did is conveniently forgotten and people paint you grey and carry back only the bitterness just because you finally decided to prioritize yourself over others.

Whats the point in trying to make me feel guilty...
I would never abandon anybody while they are vulnerable, I would be the first one to offer you my hand during times of misery. Haven't I done that before !!! Now that I have decided to pull my hand back, that's because I am sure you can swim on your own...and also because you must learn to swim on your own to become a skilful swimmer.

Difficult to please

Db : (puppy faced)I want the iPad2.
Me : Okay. Lets buy it.
Db : (puppy faced again)Ummmmmm...!!! Its very costly.
Me : Okay. Lets not buy it then.
Db : What's my b'day gift then...you never gift me anything.
Me : Okay lets buy the iPad.
Db : Too costly.
Me : How about a watch?
Db : I already have three.
Me : Few new T-shirts...
Db : Nah...I have enough.
Me : Okay PS3...
Db : I dont like playing games.
Me : Okay. A nice novel. I know you like to read.
Db : Hmm...that works. You could do that.
Me : Great. (I know he likes John Grisham)

Next day.
Db : Which book have you decided for me.?
Me : John Grisham.The Confession.
Db : Hey don't buy that. I already have that e-book in my kindle.
Me : Okay. How about 'The Associate'
Db : I have that too.
Me : 'The Appeal'???
Db : That too.
Me : Could you please visit the site and tell me which one you haven't read.
Db : (After a while) Hmm...most of them.
Me : Basically I should chuck the book buying idea?
Db : Hmm...well Yes.
Me : So what the hell do you want!!!
Db : (puppy faced)I want the iPad2.

Repeat Block one.

Men's Gadgets vs woman's clothes

Last night Db asked my opinion on buying a wireless keyboard.

Me : And what would you do with it. We do not have a desktop anyway, 3 laptops all with their own keyboards. Where would you use it?
Db : I will connect the laptop to the TV and use the keyboard with it.
Me : **Rolling my eyes**
Db : You don't think its a good idea?
Me : Its a psycho idea.

Db : I don't spend anything on gadgets.
Me : You do. You just bought a new phone...the Samsung Galaxy Ace. While your HTC was in great condition.
Db : My HTC is a dinosaur, it uses windows 5. What else did I buy?
Me : You bought the Netbook, while we already had 2 laptops.
Db : Thats because the mother board of my compaq laptop was damaged...
Me : And you got that fixed too for 10 thousand. What about the Kindle???
Db : Yeah I would accept that. But I use it.
Me : And the iPod Touch???
Db : That was a gift, freee.
Me : No, you asked your friend to get it for you from the US. He chose to gift it us as a belated wedding gift.
Db : Okay.
Me : And that laptop stand, with a fan, to keep your laptop thanda.
Db : Thats anything but a gadget.
Me : Whatever!!! The light to read the kindle in dark.
Db : I am gonna kill myself if you call that a gadget.
Me : Anything that has been bought from a croma or ezone and is or used in a computer/tablet/e-book reader qualifies as a gadget.

Db : I am terribly offended. I am gonhna hit you where it hurts the most.

He starts checking his credit card satements since 2010 to check for how much I have spent on clothing and home appliances, which comes to almost 50K.

But here is my defence.
This 50K also includes your jeans for almost 2500, SIL's shopping close to 2000, your shoes from Reebok for 6000 and may be around 3000 that we shopped at Jeypore when we visited there in October.
That leaves me with a little more than 35K. That's almost equal to the price of the iPad if I would have let you buy it.

So not bad..huh!!!

Day 22 : The famous last words

Someone had told me that the key board has more germs than a toilette seat.

Falls with a bang on the keyboard.

Day 21 : Already in a Holiday mood

Such a holiday mood that I am in and also because I stayed quite late at office last night...I almost decided I would not come to office today. But one hit on my conscience by none other than Db and I am here tearing my hair...

Day 20 : Introspect

Its strange how we wait all our life to grow up and come into our own, and when we reach that stage all we want to do is to go back to childhood. We grow up only to realise how things were simpler back then....when life revolved around things like friends, chocolates, playing and sometimes studies. Back then, we would wonder how cool it would be to go to college, to work and to be on your own.

One of biggest thing I craved as a child was to get my independence when I grew up. But we forget that independence comes with a price. There a whole lot of expectations from you. Now little mistakes have huge impacts and never can you get away with mistakes as you made as a kid. We are no longer answerable to just parents and teachers, we are also answerable to our boss at work, and if we are in a relationship we are largely answerable to our partner too. Then you get married and now you are answerable to a whole new set of people, your in-laws.

Life has been a cycle ever since we got married 3 years back. There have been problems, issues ever since. In the last 3 years there has hardly ever been a time when we sat down to think about US, I mean the both of us, what we would like to do or what exactly were OUR problems.
It was always others, my family and his which constantly claimed our attention. I believe the fault lies with US, since the responsibility belongs to the one who takes it. We voluntarily and large heartedly took their problems as ours and eventually lost ourselves within.
Sure its true that you cannot keep everyone happy...

And now, that we somehow managed to put a few things into place, and believed eventually we would be able to sigh peace...another chapter awaits US.

Day 19 :

Its going as an unfruitful day...

The servers are down so the testers cant test...
The testers can't test, so no bugs are raised...
No bugs are raised, so I have no work.

**Yawn**

Day 18

3 more days to go before I go home...

Day 17 : On the hunt

Humko toh hamare package ne mara
Technical round mein kya dum tha
Humare kasti wahan doobi
Jahaan paisa kam tha

Written in homage to all those offer letters that I lost because they believed my package was already too high for them to afford me.

Doesn't make sense...

whatever!!

Day 16 : Misplaced Intelligence

Ah I am so heartbroken.

I had reasons to believe that I would put down my papers before I start home on the 21st of this month.
But thats not happening, because I screwed up.
I had this offer from a descent company, though the package was not great but I would sure have loved to be a part of the organization. Even after many negotiations I could not bring them to give me any better pakage. I thought I would probably accept the offer and during my two months of notice period I would try to find a better offer.
But Db encouraged me to take a chance.

I was aware that my rating from the interview panel was quite high. I wrote them a mail stating that I would not be able to accept the offer if they were not willing to increase the pakage. We hoped that would ring a bell for them and they would try to put there best foot forward. It had happened several times in the past and this could have happened again. But it seems it didn't go well with them and the consultant tells me that the offer is withdrawn.
Boo hoo hoo!!!
I guess sometimes we think we are too smart, but people are smarter. I probably shouldn't have tried to use too much of my brains.

But then...lemme look at the better side of it.

I would get to work in the new building of my current employer. We are going to shift there by July and the building seems to be exteremely beautiful.

My salary here is not too bad, and I have managed to build an reputation here...because of which I believe I was given a higher designation during this appraisal cycle.

I can get a car loan from my office, at a nominal interest.

I can finally redeem the money for my french lessons, which otherwise wouldn't have been reimbursed.

Day 15 : Imagination Running Wild

Kinda free today, so lets have a thoughful post for a change.

Life has changed a lot in the past 12 years. With just two TV channels, a bicycle to ride, no internet, no cell phones and no computers(a rarety then), its difficult to imagine if we even had a life back then. Probably the next generation would not see such life changing inventions.
But on second thoughts may be they will.
Probably our parents would have thought the same about our generation...since they witnessed the invention of more essential things ...motor vehicles, plane, telephone, cameras or as small but essential things like gas stoves and mixer gringers. Probaly things that we saw in our lifetime would go more towards luxury while what our parents saw were essentials. May be our kids would witness something beyond just luxury.

If you were a Super Commando Dhruv fan in your hay days, you would understand this.
I wish they come up with this 'aayami dwaar' (inter-dimesional door) that Dhananjay had to anywhere he wants. It would open in the air and you just need to enter it and opens at wherever you want to go. They could probably have access rights on the door so as to control the access to various destinations. That would save us all the tedious travel in the traffic.

Day 14: Dilemma!!!

How big a salary pakage would make you agree to join an office with an old building which makes you feel you have gone back by 30 years on a time machine, with age old systems and extensions, with a stinky bathroom with no tissues.

Day 13 : Busy Me

The 22 day marathon blogging is turning out not a very difficult task as such.
At least I am a little more regular and have been posting quite some actions for each day.

Well...life's got busy.
Lets take today as an instance.
I had a salary negotiation with Comapny1 today, have a telephonic technical round at 12 noon with company2 and an face to face round with one of the directors of Company3today at 6pm.
Amist all this I am still working on the project which is getting more and more tedious with each passing day..

Day 12

I am early to office today.
One of the things that hate about the team is nobody takes the team meetings serously.
We are supposed to have this stand up meetings everyday at 10, when I would personally make sure each one of them does attend the meetings. But that I don't give a damn (the reason for ot would be a part of the upcoming blogs), no body really cares.

Its past 10 already and there are not even 50% of the legs available for the meeting.

Day 11: Crossing the bridge to high maintainence

I feel I have suddenly transformed into a high maintainence wife.

I suddenly find myself interested in high heels and beauty parlors, these institutions have been deprived of my attention all these years.

I went for a pedicure today for the very first time in my life and the guilt was overbearing since the attendant had to really work hard for my feet. She could have attended two clients with that amount of time.
Also, I bought a pair of high heels this evening, the second since last month.

Db's been wondering whatever happened to his low maintainence wife.

Day 10 : Its raining birthdays

Its friday...
Somehow I feel my virtual battery gets almost discharged by friday everyweek. With very little energy left, friday is the day I am the least interested in my work.

But I have something to look forward to today.
We had five birthday's this week, in a team of 30 odd people. So these 5 people have joined hands to give us a nice lunch today.

Food...good food!!! Slurppp!!!

Day 9

I wrote a whole big blog but lost it somehow. Cannot gather the patience to remember all of it and jot it down all over again.

Lemme just fill up this place to keep the 8 days old tradition alive.

Day 8 : Making up for the lost time.

Ouch!!! I missed my 22 days resolution by not posting yesterday. Shorry!!!

I was at home, not keeping very well. And I find it weird to answer them when everyone at office starts quizzing me on why I took a day off. What can I tell them, sometimes I say stomach upset and sometimes an headache. However I have always stood by it that women need more sick leaves than men anyways.

Didn't do much at home yesterday, just watched a couple of Bymokesh Bakshi episodes on youtube.
You know what!!!
I always complained that all the TV serials and movied churned out in Hindi mostly cover Punjab, and sometimes Bengal, Gujrat, Rajasthan, The southern states, Maharastra, UP and even the northenmost states Kashmir, Himachal and Jammu. But I am yet to see Orissa featured anywhere. There are no movies, no serials made on us Oriyas. But there is one reference to Orissa, and its in Byomkesh Bakshi. Though the set up is in Kolkata and the characters are all Bengali, but in the episode Kamra No 102, he mentions the ancient city of Orissa, Cuttack.

Though not a pivotial reference, yet I am happy to hear the mention of Orissa on screen for the first time.

Day 7

I don't really have anything in mind now, writing just to keep my 22 days resolution.

Day started as usual, I realized that I had dozed off after switching on the geyser, yet again in the sitting position. Epitome of laziness I think, when one can doze off while sitting on the bed.

For some unknown reason the buses were unusually crowded today. Gave a skip to almost 7-8 buses because they seemed to have no place to breathe. Managed to convince two women at the stop to share an autorickshaw with me. Each of our share turned out to be excatly equal to the bus fare we shell out everyday. Dont think its a bad idea to start sharing rickshaws everyday.

Day 6 : If thats how you want it to be

Its a day off for me and SIL, but Db is working today.

Things are getting a little out of hands and beyond control in terms of our personal life...something I did not want and had not expected. I am scared because I think its well gone beyond repair. And I have too many people and too many things I can hold responsible for this mess, incuding my overeacting to certain situations which otherwise I would have ignored and laughed it off.

But its okay. If this is how certain people want to shape their relationships with me, I am fine with all of that.

Day 5

It was a long night the last night.

India winning the World cup is an experience one has to witness to believe, and It would not have been half the fun if Db's friends werent here and more so if we hadn't decided to go out on the streets last night.

It was overwhelming, people were out with the Indian flag running around, hi- fing with the bikers. People were shouting and wailing at each other, acknowledging eachother and congratulating each other on our success in their own way... Some subtley by displaying a thumbs up or hailing at each other, some more aggressively by pulling out their shirts and a few of them trousers too.

We came back around one but were too excited to sleep. So we played cards till six in the morning.

It's been a night out after a long time and I am sure most of all Indians hadn't slept all night like us. It's amazing that how much effect a game can have on us and on the country as a whole.

Day 4 : The big day...the 2011 World Cup Final

Team India has been doing well till now.

I think the fielding is pretty tight and the team is giving it all. Also,a learning I got today. If men have to choose between a cricket match and a gadget, the choice is obvious. It's a gadget.

The wife is not is not in the running anyway!!!

After the second innings:

We woooonnnnn!!! And such a well deserved victory it was. For a non cricket lover, it was such a esctasic moment... Can't believe what the cricket lovers must be going through. They won it once the year I was born, and this time I witnessed it...now with a sore throat after all the screaming.

Congratulations India and bravo the Indian cricket team. Here we make history again!!!

Day 3

Its Ugadi today, and we were requested to wear ethnic wear. I managed to grab a gaudy salwaar kammez instead of a saree. And the good news is the dress feela a bit loose to me...so am I finally losing some weight?
Well...the sad part is I seem to be the only one remotely in ethnic wear today in my team, being a friday all others are in casuals.

But there is a lady at office who generally turns up in short skirts, she is all ethnically dressed with dozen matching bangles, and so are a few jalparis at office. I like it when the office is all colourful and happy.

On the other hand, gearing up for the World Cup finals tomorrow. Its not very surprising that I don't have any interviews lined up tomorrow, of course no one wants to miss a World Cup final with the Indian team participating. We are expecting some of Db's friends tomorrow for the match. Might get induldegent with some rich food either cooked or ordered.

Hope the Indian team wins and gets the World cup home.

Day 2 : The 2011 World Cup Semi Final

What a match it was last night, certainly worth the guilt I carried for taking an half day from office. And, I thought it was a lot of fun. May be some Pakistani players were paid to boost Sachin's luck. I witnessed at least four catches that they missed. It did pay them dearly at the end. The last Pakistani batsman, who I am told is Misbah, was almost sleep walking through out the match and woke up only at the last overs when it was already too late. I am glad the Indian team lived upto all the hype. The noise that the city was making last night after the match was overwhelming. The fire crackers and incessant noise, everybody was too excited to sleep. Most of the people are late to office today after having a late night yesterday. Also I see so many groups around discussing and having a postmortem of the match tomorrow. Its amazing how much effect a game can have on our lifes. ** Added Later My parents have recently moved in to his new apartment and it was getting tough for them to get hold of the concerned people to get their internet and cable connections. Mum has been cribbing since last 2 weeks having denied her regular Saas-bahu quota. But come the semifinals of the World cup, Dad got hold of the cable guy and managed to get the cable connection the same day morning. Men I tell you...all are the same!!!

Day 1 : Lets start

For no particular reason, I have decided to chain my blog for the next 22 days.

May be because I am guilty of not being regular to my own site, so this is a way to regularize it for a while. So I am gonna blog each day for the next 22 days. Why 22 if you might ask??? Because on the 23rd day I'll be at Bhubaneswar with my parents. SInce they have recently shifted, I can;t be sure if they'd have got the internet at home.

Today is a good day to start with. Today being the World Cup semi finals between India and Pakistan. Well...I am not really a cricket buff, yet but my manager has granted me and a couple of others the option to take a half day to watch cricket. I am not keen on the cricket match but I do not mind a half day though. So I am going to exercise my option anyway.

I feel its not fair to put so much pressure on the players. Cricket is a game after all.
I am given to believe that the place Mohali, where the match is to take place, seems to have no more hotel reservations left, no place for private jet landing as well and while the tickets of the match have been sold at insane prices. Also it seems some of the offices have declared it an half day today. I hope the players after winning over the Aussies, were taken to some remote and secluded place where they did not have access to the telivision or newspapers.

Well...I'd be leaving in an hour may be, so lets do some work till then.

Flexible Believer

Its not strange when people show me gaping mouths when I tell them a Brahmin while being surrounded with all kinda kebabs and dead things which once moved. I don't get it, similar to how I don't get it when people give me the look of being a sinner who has just lost the right to live when I admit to having not watched the GodFather series. So what...I haven't even watched Sholay completely (stoops to avoid the jooton ki baarish)

According to them I am a huge black dot to Brahmins and probably needs to be banished fom the Brahmin community, I don't mind though (But please throw me to the OBC so that my kids will at least get the quota reservation). As for me, my beliefs do not cater to Brahmism or elsewhere.

I believe do anything and everything that makes you happy and doesn't harm others. Everything else falls into place...family, society and God too. Like most of the times when the MIL or my Mom inqure about me visiting the temple or fasting today, I with all my sincerity and goodwill always answer assertive while munching on a plate of Chicken at the KFC. So you see, everybody is happy...and when everyone is, God is happy too.

But yes, I do consider myself as an vegetarian. I am vegetarian at all times except when I feel like it, or my friends have been ordering the same, I am dead bored/frustrated, or when I haven't had it in the last 2 days.

If this doesn't make sense to you, I cant help it. It doesn't make sense to me either when people have been asking for a public holiday tomorrow to watch the India-Pak World Cup semifinals...Big Deal!!!

Window shopping is not bad

Window shopping is not for me. Not that I buy only when I need, but window shopping just isn't my kinda sport. Db does that better than me, just that he window shops things that do not interest me...gadgets, and sometimes furniture too.

But it isn't such a bad thing after all. And I realized it only two weeks back.

We were at the lifestyle on that Saturday evening. And Db was literally pulling me across the Lifestyle Homecentre. He loves to look around sofas, beds, cupboards...I was already bored out of my skull.
And suddenly, we set our eyes on a dressing table kinda thing, which had some good number of drawers. The tag on it said 'WAS 24999 NOW 4999'. What the hell!!! It didn't look that cheap. And a basic dressing table had cost us 3.5-4K some 10-12 years back when my parents bought it. We thought it must be a printing issue and the price must be 14999. We checked with the concerned people and it turned out to be the 4999 as printed.
Well, the trick of these sales are to make you buy things that you do not necessarily need. And more storage is something you can always do with. We quickly calculated that it would help us store our laptop cables, chargers, hard disks, pendrives and stuff and so its a good buy for 5K. But we were and still are quite sure, this stuff is wrongly marked for the given sum.

We did order the furniture and we were assured we would be given a fresh piece and not the display one, may be this one had some defect hence cost less. They committed to deliver it in 2 weeks.
The last 2 weeks we pretty much expected that they would ask us to pay a balance of 10K the day they deliver the piece to us.
But we recieved the furniture last evening, with no visible defects and at the same price that we had originally paid for.
But we are still not convinced that it is for 5K.

So, window shopping is not that bad I guess .

I wanna un-know things

Read it somewhere...just tweeking it a little bit to suit myself.

I wish I could unknow things...you like we know things, wish we could unknow them as well. Because when you know things, and finally decide to do something based on your knowings you still cannot go to sleep contended. Because people around you who matter will have opinions, justifications and questions on our actions. These opinions, justifications and questions are all I fear. I fear I am losing respect for people I ought to respect. I fear what if at the end of it, its me who turns out to be wrong.

Museebat padi, toh roya tha,
Jyada mussebat padi, toh chup ho gaya tha,
Bahut zyada museebat padi hai, toh hasta hoon,
Aakhir duniya mein basta hoon

Patiala House

Given the fact that most of the last movies of Akshay Kumar were sheer headaches, yet I had the patience and risk appetite of watching 'Patiala House' today. The SIL waarned me well before hand, yet it was my undying love for AK since the 'Mohra' days, when I was a dreamy eyed teenager who fell for his charms when he would fight away the goons double his size to save his lady love or the 'Kanoon' in most cases.

And I am so glad i have good things to say about an Akshay Kumar movie after a long time.

While '3 Idiots' subtlety pointed out on parents trying to mould their children to their expectations and aspirations, the concept is pretty in the face with 'Patiala House'. I loved the beginning of the movie which shows a subdued AK leading a life chosen by his father. And surprisingly played well by a usually over-the-top Akshay.
For a change, this film seems to have a story and a tight screenplay with most of the loose ends tied up.
I do vehemently criticize migrants who go abroad to earn dollars or pounds yet refuse to accept the culture of the place. This ideology, I believe is very wrong be it Simran's dad in DDLJ, Jasmeets's dad in 'Namastey London' or Rishi Kapoor in 'Patiala House'. Yet Rishi Kapoor being Rishi Kapoor manages to add a certain honesty to his character. Many of the scenes given to Anuska Sharma looked forced, the movie could have done without them. And how I wish the songs were chopped off. Why do most filmmakers seem to believe that half of India is Punjabi and the other half are dying to know how Punjabis speak, dance, dress or live. I am going to boycott the next movie which showcases a Punjabi wedding song, had enough of them already.

I like the climax which had huge possibilities of going excessively dramatic, but is surprisingly kept more subdued and practical, and hence had more impact.

I understand the fact that people have lost faith on Akshay Kumar movies, given his last few releases. No wonder the theater was almost empty. Yet, it was worth the risk, and 'Patiala House' indeed was a pleasant watch.

Three years of marraige...completes

Okay...so we celebrate our third anniversary today. How, you might ask...
The answer to that is Db is celebrating his anniversary with his clients discussing his new requirements and I am celebrating mine coding to generate RTGS payment messages.
Gifts...yes. We do have them. He bought me a pair of jeans last week, which FITS. And I presented him the 3000 rupees worth free books facility that my employer gave me for completeing an year with them.

But the good part is, no one's complaining.
Why...may be because we never felt the need to have a special day to have to express our love to each other, or a reason to celebrate our togetherness. The fact that we cherish and celebrate being together each day, takes away the need to celebrate that one special day.

Hmm...so if you are reading this and I know you will.
I know you carry the guilt when I go out all by myself to buy chicken for dinner while you were merrily lying on the bed surrounded by your favorite gadgets, or when ever you found me standing in the volvo unable to find myself a seat to office, or when ever you found me cleaning the house fanatically of your papers,jackets, clothes and wires...
I know you carry the guilt of giving me a tougher married life than I had anticipated...yet just having you makes up for all of it. Coz, niether did I ever anticipate sharing a such a great life with you.

Eeshhh!!! I have never been half this cheesy!!! okay...I didn't write this. My system just got hacked and has probably been taken over by SRK inspired virus.

Innovations...phew!!!

More and more meetings to find innovations at work going nowhere.

I think we rae moving too fast. While I feel the team is not ready for innovations, we need improvements here. Improvements, which would eventually build the platform to introduce innovations.

Currently, we pitch in with an overdose of ideas, but we fail to implement them. Very similar to, as they say its easier to achieve success but difficult to maintain it at the top. Other than just one we have failed miserably to implement any of the innovations we started, only because the team is not ready to accept and participate in the changes.

Yes, I believe before we flood ourselfs with innumerous ideas and innovations, lets try to look within ourselves and think...'are we ready???' Instead lets try to make a more committed, sportive and interested team first.

They say the team works the best when the word 'I' is reduced to minimum. I cannot help but take myself as the example of the Frankestine's monster in the team.
When I joined a year back, I was brimming with ideas. I genuinely wanted to make a difference, a motivated team member. I stand here today, a year passed, demotivated so much so that I feel like just a necessary furniture in a house. I do have chances now to take up the changes and start afresh, but I am just not interested anymore.

Why??? Find the answer to this and all your questions are answered.
That would be a good change to start with.

Assumptions

The post is triggered by a random discussion with the BA (Business Analyst) on the bullet point in the functional spec which said 'Assumptions'. The points under this heading seemed outrageous to me...
'We cannot assume such things'
'Yes we can', he argued. 'To anything we can't find logic to, we assume them'

As much as this was a HAIN!!!!! moment for me, but yes I do certainly agree to his definition of assumption...at least with respect to life.

As a kid and a teenager I had my own set of weird assumptions, things I look back and go 'Me..Really!!!'. Things which had no logic, no prior experience to infer such, but yet strongly believed and adhered to. Lemme list down a few :

1. Any guy driving a bullet is essentially a Gunda. But the vice versa is not true, all Gundas do not have bullets, even the scooter, luna or even bicycle driving ones can be equally menacing. You can't afford to be either friends nor enemies with them...so just smile and wave girls!!!

2. All guys who are dark (not wheatish...dark) are smokers.

3. Any guy who is a good dancer is a flirt. So you know not to get ideas when he tries to strike a conversation with you or wants to have a dance with you. On the contrary, guys with two left feet are the ones you should target...they are the ones with a heart of gold.

4. Only the village belles pleat their hair, the smarters would rather keep their hair loose no matter how untidy they look.

5. People who say 'Yes' are villagers, who say 'Ya' are wannabes and the ones who say 'Yeah' are the ones who have completed the evolution cycle to smartness.

6. Its fashionable to announce 'Shit!!! I didn't study a thing' before the exams, 'Oh it went horrible !!!' post-exam and declare a 'I donno what he was smoking while correcting my papers !!!' when the results are out and you pass.

And the final one...this one while I was a tod :

7. Its not we that grow up, its the clothes that shrink in size. So you gotta store your favorite dresses carefully, when they become too small, you can make your dolls wear them.

Snippets

@lifestyle.

Me : **Picking up two handbags** So which one do you like?
Db : **Hardly bothering to look** Niether.
Some giggling teenagers around : **What else!!! Giggle uncontrollably**

Men...Phew!!!

What an end to this year

Cold, cough and fever. What an end to this year...
I haven't been to office ince last two days, and mostly not going tomorrow also. And what the hell...I am al alone at ome watching back to back episodes of CID.
I had such a terrible chest pain today that I almost thought I had an attack.

It all started with my sudden fascination to belly dancing. I downloaded the tutorial videos from youtube and started with the basic stretching exercises. The body pain and the sneezing started almost immediately. The rest of the issues started the next day.

With my vaccation to my hometown Rourkela getting cancelled, and such a deterioting health, it can't get any worse this new year. :{{

My year revisited - 2010 is coming to an end

Another week, and the year is gone by.
Its been a quite happening year, many major decisions taken, many events that affect life forever and the bitter taste of how compromises feel like.

Let me pen them down, the major events of 2010

The job switch : 8th Feb, I decided to call it quits, I quit my job and joined here. I was quite skeptical about this job profile and intended only to stay till I get a better offer. But I did end up staying here despite of the crappy project and team and outdated technologies. Why??? probably I would be able to answer that next year.

Bhai gets a job : After more than a year of hardship, Bhai finally landed with a job at HCL. It not only boosted his confidence, and brought an end to misery of the entire family which made us all lose sleep for all these days, but also fixed most of his issues in his personal life as well...or so I'd like to believe.

Db's Australia trip : Db visited Australia for work, and stayed almost 3 months. We got to have a taste of singlehood again, yet it was necessary not just because we needed the money that came from it...also to realize that we do not want to stay away from each other for such a long time ever again.

We bought a house : A decision that affected us like never before. To buy this house of our dreams, We took up a home loan for 40 lakhs, which we are paying up each month. Most of our savings are gone and we find ourselves cutting on many little things that we desire. But as they say, you cannot have everything...to gain something, you have to lose something else.

A realization : I realized eventually that being polite and nice doesn't help. This is one trait that could make you proud of yourself, but the world doesn't need it. You could probably do things for people considering them as your duty towards them, or empathizing on their situation but the feeling also has to be mutual. It can't be one-sided. I somehow don't find the reflection of my empathy on the other side, which makes me feel I am being taken advantage of. All was well, till I started getting uncomfortable of the fact that my kindness is being taken as my weakness/ foolishness. I am not a fool, its just that I cannot bring myself to hurt people who matter or should matter. But clearly now that the feeling is not mutual. So its time to take a stand and get as selfish as I can get.

And finally : Its my maid who triggered it, though she is not the only one...she was just the final nail in the coffin.

Maid : Didi...why don't you consider expanding your family?

Me: We have enough responsibilities now, lets finish them off first. Then probably we'd have time to think about ourselves.

Maid : Hmm...(she understands!!!) But you should think about yourself also naaa. A kid will bring happiness to both of you.

Me : Achaa...and who'd take care of that happiness??? We are both too busy with our jobs. I cant quit mine...we need the money that comes from it.

Maid : Main hoon naa (Aila SRK!!! After cooking, cleaning and dusting...she wants to extend her services to baby sitting). I'll handle everything, you don't worry at all.

Hmm!!! Maidy dear, you were the only one who was pending to coax me into it. And now that my parents, Db parents, my relatives, Db's relatives, our neighbours, my parents neighbours, Db's parents neighbours, my collegues, Db's collegues, the neighbouring cats, dogs, cows, mosquitoes, cockroaches and at last my maid also wants it...I finally give up.

Next year its is...now will you puhleeeze stop bothering me!!!

foggy at bangalore

At 7 in the morning, my alarm shoots. I have oiled my hair last night to have a hair wash today. The last two days have been quite sunny so I expected it to be the sasme today. I open the balcony door and 'Shit !!!' I go.
Db wakes up to it 'What's wrong?' he queries
'Come and have a look.'
He walks up to the balcony and 'Wow !!!' he goes.
'What's wow about it??'
'What's shit about it???'
'I have to wash my hair'
'Your problem, I told you so'

What we saw outside the balcony was a rare scene ion Bangalore. At least I havent seen it in the three years that I have been here.

And given below are more pictures of the fateful day. Db handed me his phone to click pictures around while he was driving. Wish he'd be half that enthusiastic to click my pictures. Sigh!!!

The Ejipura Signal

The inner ring road

The EGL campus

The Diamond District (Db's office)

I changed the blog header picture

Now this is what features in my blog title. I hung the picture here in order to keep track in case I happen to change the picture again.

Db wasn't too impressed by it.

He believed this picture doesn't depict me in any way. Contrary to the image of this woman walking carefully in a beach, he visualises me as someone who would be jumping and splashing around...basically creating nuisance.

We tried to find pictures on keywords like 'impulsive' or 'unpredictable' kinds...but niether caught our attention.

So be it for the time being.

It backfired...

Always believed a developer’s job is way tougher than any of the BA's and QA's.
I have been actively involved with testing as well in my previous projects, and I realized the biggest challenge with testing is to try and keep yourself interested. With this, Db has ever been criticizing that I do not respect the job that others do, while only giving credibility to my own job.

I beg to differ. It’s not that I do not give any integrity to testers and BA's, it’s just that I feel their's is a job even I can do, and to some extend I do as well...as a developer we do have a descent domain knowledge and we are involved in testing as well, maybe not as profoundly as the specialized people with the corresponding designations, but certainly if need be, I can with some effort fill in their shoes. But can a BA or a tester do what a developer can...can they solve technical issues or develop modules like us!!!
Yet, particularly in this project, I am amazed to see how BA's and testers behave as our bosses just because one provides us requirements while the other is supposed to review and find faults with what we have developed. They have to be spoonfed with everything from starting their servers, to creating their paths as well as cleaning up old data from their databases. Blasphemous!!!

Yes, I did try to bring about some changes in the team, to be able to change their mindsets and reduce the dependencies on the developers. I was even successful to some extend despite having very limited support from people in the team who were resistant to change. With the inclusion of some more new people, things were fairly smoother.

Yet, I am cribbing.

Because, I find the responsibilities of the change all coming to me while the credit is going to others.I was all game for the inclusion of the TestOlympics in the team. It would help us in the long run to identify more bugs and deliver bug free applications. But because I was game for it, I was assigned the task to prepare the platforms for 6 domains, I even participated in the game to raise bugs and now that we have 52 bugs just by including 30% of the application for the scope of the game, the BA’s happily raised them in the Bug tracking tool and assigned them to me. While the hard work is all mine the credit goes to somebody else.

How can we expect people to be proactive in continous improvement in the team when very obviously one section of the team is clearly overworked than the other, while the other section enjoys the credit for bringing in the change. With what has come out of the recent event, the developers are much more skeptical of trying anything new...at least I am.

Murphy's law it is

If you have four pairs of socks in a drawer, what is the probability to find a correct pair in four picks?
Mathematically, I don't care...but practically its zero. More so, when its early in the morning and you have to catch a bus to office and you are already late....all the four picks are gonna give you a different sock each time.

For the lesser mortal people like us, the only law that works is the Murphy's law.

La Français

Je me présente.
Mon nom est Mansi. J'ai 27 ans. Je suis un ingénieur. Je suis marié. Mon mari est un ingénieur ainsi. Son nom est Db. J'aime écrire des blogs où je me connecter mes pensées à différentes phases de ma vie. Je déteste la circulation dans Bangalore. Je rêve d'acheter une masion dans Bangalore.

Okay...now that was french. I have been burning my morning sleep on weekends and taking french lessons since almost a month now...and above is most of the french I have learnt till now. To decrypt the above please copy the same here.

Talking about languages, I am well versed with English, Hindi, Oriya, Bengali and to some extend Punjabi too. I like to learn new languages (Je aime apprende nouvelles langues). Yet French is a language I hate (Pourtant, Je déteste français), not just because its a tongue twister but also because what you write is not what you pronounce. Most of the words sound all similar to me and as if you were just blowing air out to somebody.

Yet, it worked...when one of the clients was here recently. He seemed impressed when I spoke in some toota-foota french with him. So, see its worth it!!!

I am a woman...here me roar!!!

I am writing finally, it hurts me a lot having not visited it since almost a month now.
The last few weeks have been crazy. With no exaggeration, there hasn't been any time to pee either. Its different and quite difficult, as I realize now, to be responsible myself for the deadlines. Also I have again started to change things around me, and luckily this time I am not the only person who wants some change and is willing to do something about it.

Among other things, this time around I have been at the recieving end of how women do not and to some extent cannot take their work seriously after a point. I'd be red in face when the women in the team would not turn up for the standup meetings in time most of the days on the pretext that she cooks the meals, or her MIL is here or because her husband was too much in a hurry today to drop her at office and she had to take a bus or an autorickshaw. Come'on now, you have to find a balance...I am a woman too with the all these problems and more, yet I dont create such nuisance.

But issues are more serious now. While one lady in the team is yet again on her maternity leave (3+3 months) while she returned from her last maternity leave only this february...the other one suddenly stopped coming one fine day, Since last 5 fridays, she'd been calling every friday to say that she isn't coming this week because she is expecting.
Sometime last week, while having lunch, my manager expressed his concern on key resources being unavailable as cases like mentioned above. He questioned saying if these are the issues they bring along, tell me why do I hire women in my team...I'd rather hire only men.
With all due respect to his concerns and reasons, and the fact that we women have to at at some point of time have to give importance to family and the carrer has to take a back seat...we cannot take away the fact that they are now not considered as dependable resources any more. And this too not just by the men in the team, but sorry to say for me as well. When the expecting mother is back in the team, I would never find her reliable enough to give priority work to her...at least for another year or so.

I could only reply to my manager 'If everyone starts thinking likewise, who'll give us jobs then!!!'

It bothers me that some day I would be at the recieveing end of this. Some day my team will not find me dependable and I would spend probably a year or two of my career like a vegetable. Yes, I know a lot of people to whom it doesn't matter as long as they draw their monthly salary...but it would certainly matter to me.

The previous generation, that of my mom, I found her judged on looks or how good she cooks or how clean she maintains the house or how cordially she behaves with her inlaws. But I find myself judged on all this and more. In addition people also judge me on my job,my salay my presentaion as a good hostess. The freedom as a woman has increased and with that the criterias for judging us has also increased. That is probably because we are stuck in the middle of the evolution cycle. While we have probably evolved to the other side, yet we still have a older generation to please who are stuck in between.

But its amazing how we claim to be to equal to men while there are still norms in the societe to be followed only by women.
Forget the society, I even stand by it that God Himself has been discriminating between the two sexes, and whatever litlle was left the societe took care of it, so that it would take numerous generations to bring the female species in competetion to the males. Sure, not just the ones who made the norms of the society, even the God who created us humans must have been a man himself.

True, the mentality is fast changing, men are more accomodating now and have lesser male egos, but what is the ratio of such men!!! I still see a bigger ratio of men around, and that too the educated mass who still take huge amount of dowry with pride, who wouldn't let their wifes the freedom to work or to take their own decisions, women getting reduced into cooking machines and baby bearing machines.

Hopefully,the next generation will see less of the social discrimination. Yet, the physical weakness which God chose to give to all women would never change. We as women will still need extra sick leaves every month, we would still have to take maternity breaks.

As simple or as complex as you please...

At the wrong side of twenties, I look back to recall the various problem sets that I came across at various age brackets. And I remember playing the Agony Aunt to all these problems.

I must admit I have had a pretty uncomplicated life, the reason being that I always wanted it that way. I believe I am a very uncomplicated person myself and so are my circumstances and my decisons. So the problems I had to face were mostly things I never had control on...monetary problems, joblessness and a brief heart break(for which I had nobody else but myself to blame...and I accept it with humility).

Disclaimer : I admit I am looking at just one side of the coin, probably the men or the MIL's on the other end have a different version of the story. I am just talking about the problems I have seen around at various phases of life.

During school, I have seen my friends sulk over the classmates/seniors/neighbors they had a crush on...which influenced by the then Bawllywood would magnify into love triangles, quadrangles or polygons. On one such occasion, I remember a friend who was crying her lungs out, since she was supposedly sacrificing her love for her best friend who seemed to have a crush on the same guy...all the while the guy in question was unaware of the feelings of both the ladies. Seems so childish to me now...that I was actually consoling and applauding her for her selflessness!!!
Yes, even I had a crush on several males, including a senior who was a ditto copy of Akshay Kumar...just a tad shorter and a few shades darker may be. My longest crush lasted almost a year on the most intelligent and sharpest guy in my class (intelligence has always appealed me). I remember I used to keep track of his tuition timings and I would stand and wait at the backgate of my house only to watch him pass the main road while going to the tuition classes. But I was always aware that I was never serious about any of these guys and would sooner or later find someone else whom I would find more interesting and the current ones would become history soon. So life was much simpler.

During the late teens, I found myself at the ladies hostel....
The set of problems had gone a tad level higher when the girls were more confident now than at school, and also had a good amount of male attention. This was the time when most of my friends got hooked and then was the time when there were typical teenage and relationship problems on how she expected more male attention that she was already getting, how the boyfriend was being insensitive, or how he wasn't giving enough/expensive gifts unlike the boyfriend of the roommate, on how he forgot her birthday or how they keep arguing on everything under the sun and more blah blah blah.
Me...!!! No boyfriend no problems. Only crushes which would bounce soon.
My problems were mostly monetary when I would have to borrow old books from library because I couldn't buy them, or had to do petty stuff like distributing pamphlets at malls to raise money (though I enjoyed them too) or spend long hours at the computer labs for my projects since we couldn't afford a PC at home. It pisses me off when youngsters with a high end laptop, bikes and mobiles complain about their misery because they don't have a levis jeans. Phew!!! I don't have one till date.

Soon I landed myself in Kolkata with my first job. Now the problems took a more serious angle...how the boyfriend couldn't get himself a job because of the backs he couldn't clear due to the time he wasted with her, how he has changed because he doesn't get her a rose everyday like he used to earlier (What the eff!!!), how her parents are against marrying him because he is from another caste/religion, how he isn't settled (read rich) enough to get married to while she is getting better proposals, how she believes her family culture is different to his and she believes she cannot adjust...
Well...this was the time I started going around with one my family friend, who was a US return, dollar earning, football playing chora. All was well until his mother intervened and wanted to get him married to a more sober village belle who would stay as a housewife, and like an obedient son he said 'Okay Mamma' and got married the girl he hardly knew, within a month after we broke up. My mistake, trusted the wrong guy who didn't have a vertebral column and got myself in a soup.

And then marriage happened and Db happened.
Now I have friends who have more serious problems that makes life miserable. How the MIL is a rude lady, how staying with in laws doesn't give any privacy, how the MIL's are controlling the husband like a remote control, how the husband is a 'Mamma's boy' who still can't let go of his mother's pallu, how the husband doesn't save a penny and spends all the residual money on his parents every month, how despite of having a love marriage love has flown out of the window, how coming from a nuclear family she feels all suffocated in a joint family, how balancing the personal and professional life is getting difficult but she can't quit her job because they need the money that comes from it.
As for me, yes marriage was a bit tough. Day one I woke up to responsibilities. I have always taken pride of the fact that I have never been dependent on anybody, nobody except my parents (and the DB's friend who helped Bhai when he was going through his worst crisis ever) can standup and say that I owe something to them and I would like it to remain the same till I live. But on the other hand, being the youngest in the family even I hadn't taken any responsibility myself. So phat gayee!!! But I believe it's not something I can't deal with or lemme put it another way, I think I can deal with anything that comes my way. **collars up**

But I have met another set of people who have no significant problems to talk about. They are from stinkingly rich families, have a great job, have married the man of their dreams, have accommodating in laws and leading a very easy and comfortable life. So having nothing better to do, they end up creating problems for themselves. How??? Buy a lavish house while you don't need one and start complaining how the monthly EMI's are a pain in the a** and how the in laws are so mean that they won't help pay up the money. Come'on now!!!

I remember something very valuable learnt in the simpler past. That everything is as simple as you please. Even the present.
Now, its for you to figure out what you please.

The Pizza in the making

A very happy diwali to all.

And the long weekend passed by

Hey good folks of the planet...

That was the long weekend that passed giving way to another long weekend for Diwali...and that's the good part.

This long weekend, most of my early morning sleeping time was mercilessly consumed by my french lessons. French, as I would love to hate it is much more tricky than I thought. While they spell it something, they pronounce it something entirely different. What the Eff!!!
Suddenly all this idea of taking French lessons seems so bad to me. But the sad part is, its a 60 hours session...and only 12 hours is completed by now...and considering the fact that its only on weekends, I almost of 2 more months to go...boo hoo hoo!!!

This weekend we also happened to visit the house of one of my most loyal (and perhaps the only one) reader of my blog. His house which he also happens own by paying a hefty price to a premium builder, was as unkept as a haystack. After we finished cleaning the house it eventually stared looking like sweet home and we throughly enjoyed the home on the 15th floor.
Ah !!! I want my house too ASAP.
Oh didn't I tell you the secret I was keeping was the 2BHK apartment I bought from the Purvankara builders. Its called the Purva Skywood located Off Sarjapur Road. The only catch is, its under construction and would be handed over to us only in 3 years.

The office is hauntingly empty today with most of the junta celebrating Diwali in their natives. The cafeteria is echoing while the restrooms are surprisingly very neat. Looks like the world has come to an end and we are the only lone survivers. And then we have this lousy weather where all I can think of is Mom serving me a hot cup of tea with some yummmm pakodas.
But that is not to be. I am to sit here in my lonesome cubicle and having nothing to do.

My calorie day

Day started well with Db joining the club of people who tell me that I seem to have lost weight.

Coming from Db, it was something to be taken into account seriously, since this is the first time he has said something like this. Cho Chweet...Maar Java Gud Kha ke !!!
So lost I have...I believe it!!!

Hadn't packed my b'fast today, so thought should have the minimum caloried idlis but ended up having a dosa. While returning from the ITPL mall, pictured somebody grabbing a choco frappe and the devil got better on me. Carried a choco frappe to my desk much to the wonder of everbody who had complemented me on looking a few pounds lighter yesterday.
Friday is our official team lunch day...but since quite some months I have been getting my lunch nevertheless. But today was an exception...so I had to join the team despite of my intention to have little or no lunch today. Ended up having Thai noodles...why???because it was cheap...v cheap and I could easily distribute it to others!!!
And then my manager proposed to give us an icecream treat. Ah!!! Perfect timing!!! I tried to convince him to postpone it to next week but it did not work. Disregarding my Brahmin genes which drives us to take poison too if it comes for free,I tried to wriggle out of the icecream parlour...but he coaxed me into it(I feel v strongly that he is quite fond of me). So a hot chocolate fudge it was!!!

I am sorry guys...to everybody who gave me this finally-you-seem-to-be-losing-weight kinda encouraging gestures, it doesn't seem to work...it never has and probably never will.

**Sigh**

Back from Sasural

We finally came back from sasural yesterday afternoon.

With the kinda horrific stories I have coming accross from my friends, who seem to to be terribly troubled by MIL's and SIL's...I think I have a got a lot better deal than others in terms of in laws. But its human nature to keep asking for more...

I have basically had a city bred life in a nuclear family, while my in laws are a whole bunch of relatives, closely knit together who seem to have a say over anything and eveything. The lifestyle is far from being like in cities and while my Mum is at the extreme end of cleaniness, my MIL stands at the other extreme end. While inlaws are more into rituals and stuff like that, my family has been pretty much liberal with such things.
It works in certain ways...while my inlaws expect us to be present at most of the occasions where eleborate puja paath and family gettogethers are done, my parents appreciate us when we join them at the new year party at the club. So its easier to divide our stay at both the families...we end up attending the puja during Dussera, Diwali or Rath Yatra at inlaws place and celebrate the New Year and Christmas celebrations with my Dad and Mum.
So convinient!!! And no one is complaining...

And now that we are back...it feels there is no place like Bangalore and no home like the one that you yourself have set up...errr..let's say...messed up.

Among other updates, as I had expected, the release is still not done yet and whether I like it or not eventually I am gonna be a part of this release. Phew!!!

The management seems to have lost the painting that I had submitted for the painting competetion, and niether did I win any prize for the same. So all lose-lose here.

Before leaving for Sasural I could feel a cavity in my upper jaw, Db crosschecked and told me there were two cavities and when I checked with the Dentist yesterday she told me it was three.
So some good painful days coming soon in trying to fix the tooth decay.

A battle lost always

This is one battle I never seem to win, no matter who my opponent is.

Figure this with my Bhabhi on doing any household task :

Bhabhi : Leave it!!! I’ll do it.

Me : No, Its okay..I’ll do it.

Bhabhi : Its okay…you take rest…I’ll do it.

Me : No…Its okay…you take rest…I’ll do it.

Bhabhi : No no no…I’ll do it.

Me : Okay

And the tables turned when I am the Bhabhi :

Me : Leave it!!! I’ll do it.

SIL : No, Its okay..I’ll do it.

Me : Its okay…you take rest…I’ll do it.

SIL : No…Its okay…you take rest…I’ll do it.

Me : No no no…I’ll do it.

SIL : Its okay Bhabhi…you take rest…I’ll do it.

Me : Okay

I wonder why can’t ever win this battle with anyone.

But Pappu can't dance saala...

A little late for this post though. It’s on the annual day dance competition at office.
Not too good, not too bad.

I think all of them were good dancers and I appreciate their courage and sportsmanship of coming on stage. But many of them didn’t know the tricks of the trade.

For a solo dance the trick is to use the stage in order to keep the audience engaged. Also it’s very important to maintain a good energy level on stage…it you sleepwalk through the show, so will the audience. Most of them danced through as if they hadn’t had food since last three days.

Somehow, I am a not so impressed when people take advantage of their classical training in dance. I think that’s giving them undue advantage over people who are not trained and only use their spontaneity on stage. So despite of the fact that I like the classical dance bit in the competition, I would stay away from giving it any credit.

As for the group dance, the trick is synchronization. You need not necessarily have complex steps but you need to coordinate properly, in terms of movements as well as the energy levels that should also be similar in a group…which was very much missing in all the group events. Also to keep the audience interested, you should make as many formations as possible and not just dance at one place.

Sigh!!! Lita yaar!!! How I wish you were here, we could have shown them how exactly you can set the stage on fire. Without my perennial partner, dance is something that looks so alien to me.
Hum bhi toh dikayen ki ball boundry ke bahar kaise jaati hai!!!

This And That...

Its been an eventful week, this one and the last week.

How I wished I could put up a few pics from the 'Retro Dressing' competition at office in my blog. But I won't because somehow in all the pics I look like an overblown baloon.
I have always been aware of the fact that I am a photographer's nightmare, since the day I visited a professional photographer to click my matrimony pics. He was oblidged to click a few good pics of me since I paid him a fortune for the job. I saw him struggling to get me friendly to the camera but the end result was still me looking like a baby elephant.
Db maintains that he selected my photo to meet up because he believed since I being myself so huge I wouldn't reject him, he himself being 92 kgs back then.
But sad...I could never ever have any good pics.

I am participating in the painting competition today, I hope my painting wins something at least...its not too bad I believe, coming from a self trained painter.

We have a release next Wednesday and I am so happy I wouldn't be around then. Though going to Sasural is not the ideal holiday I would want, but I am happy with anything that keeps me away from this release. Its going to be real messy this time, so 'if you cant face it, escape it'.
Though escaping it was not actually my plan. The release was to be done on 25th September, and I had planned my holidays well after that and booked my tickets well in advance. I am not really to be blamed if the release dates kept postponing.
You know what!!! I have a gut feeling that the release would still be pending when I return on the 26th.

Okay anyway, headed to the homeland state in two days...and hopefully will have a few good pics to update.

Beyond Mandir and Masjids

What difference does it make to the Mango people...whether a Mandir or Masjid is built over it.

Of what I make out of the discussions going around in office, people have moved on...they'r more worried about storing up food in case the shops are closed for a couple of days (which indeed was the case yesterday), or if they'd find a Volvo back home today, or is it safe to watch the Rajnikanth starrer ENDHIRAN this weekend. They'r all busy mind-their-own-buinesss and safeguard themselves and their family, than to be bothered about who ends up getting the piece of land.
But for sure, except for a handful of people...I see a great level of religious tolerance, or may be it-doesn't-matter kinda attitude in the so called educated mass...which is indeed a good sign.

I am happy to see how the Aam Aadmi has reacted so maturely to the Ayodhya verdict. Necessary precautions were taken while the city went on a self imposed almost-a-curfew yesterday...but over all it has been peaceful. Though these things are normally politically motivated, and also the media has been doing its bit efficiently to create unneccesary panic and airing highly provokative statements all day...yet things still look unaffected.

Is this a sign that Indians are finally getting tolerant to all religions, or are they getting mature, or indifferent, or is life getting too busy just making ends meet. Or has the judiciary and police become more efficient or is it the politicians who have finally found their conscience (certainly the media is yet to find theirs).

Whatever the case could be, its certainly welcome.
As they say...there has been enough temples and mosque, let's build a Nation now.

Just a thought...

If I decide to open a resturant someday...what do i call it???
....

ANYWHERE ANYTHING

Because, on an average when you ask people what they wanna have, they say ANYTHING...and when you ask people where they wanna have food, they say ANYWHERE...

Sleeping like a log

I am writing this blog because I have nothing better to do and internet is free at office.
This is an incident 6 years and 15 kgs ago...

A typical winter mid-night at hostel, we are all draped in our warm blankets/rajai's and snoring away to glory. Suddenly I felt something near my feet, may be I thought it was a pile of clothes or something, so I just kicked it to push it out of my lazy sleep. What ever it was, it fell on the snoring Lil's face with a thumppppp...and hell broke loose.
Ah...what a noisy dream, why is everybody shouting in my dream!!!?

Lil has a very vunerable sleep, she wakes up even when I turn a page of my book and yells at me...'can't you turn pages quietly???' and I go '@##$%^&^'. She can be quite troublesome if you disturb her sleep, so we normally maintain decorom while she is sleeping. And on that fateful night when something thumped right on her face, she woke up screaming so loudly, she could have brought the hostel ceiling down. My other roomie Supi woke up too. They rushed to swith the lights on...it was a CAT, an UGLY BLACK CAT !!! Now the combined effect 'Mile Sur Mera Tumhara' and they kept screaming incesantly while jumping on their respective beds, so much to bring the girls from the adjacent room to ours.
A bunch of five girls trying to drive the cat out, jumping screaming and giggling all the way at midnight...takes half an hour to succeed.

And it was revenge time, Lil turned to me and I let loose a lazy snore. Enough to get her into one of her ugly moods, she pulled me, brought me to sit on my bed and everybody gave me a piece of their mind venting out their frustration on me for being woken up from their sleep. And when everybody left I went back to what I had been doing best...snoring.

I woke up a little not-too-fresh in the morning. I had had a bad noisy dream last night. I woke up Lil lest she misses the college bus. While we got ready I asked her the question of the century...
'Oye...Kal raat kkoi aaya tha kya??' (Did somebody come into the room last night ???)

I have an iPhone

No really I do...

Only its called an sciphone, has no wifi or multitouch, the camera is terrible, doesn't have the half eaten apple icon on it and costs only 2500 INR odd...one of the amazing copies that only China can churn out.
We had been to the SP road last night to look for some basic dual sim phone and we came accross this. This one totally swept me off my feet.
And...Maa Kasam, every single person in office whom I showed this phone, started with rolling their eyes on me with this people-have-so-much-money-to-spare look until I told them it was a cheap copy of the revered iPhone...and it gets me a lot of attention otherwise too.

Check this out...
I barely managed to grab one of the weird seats on the Volvo, the ones just infront of the backdoor of the bus. Its a weird place, you tend to see the asses of the standing passengers of the bus. As the bus started filling up, I could see more and more asses targetting me. What if they unite and target their natural gases at me...I could be knocked out for several hours. I tried to close my eyes, but the sudden jerks brought me back to the reality every now and then. Having nothing better to do, I started reading the labels on their asses...I mean the labels on their trousers...Arrow, Van Heusen and unknown brands like DeZire, Crimson and even RockStar...I chuckeled to that.

Ah...too boring...time to explore my new iPhone (I insist on calling it an iPhone).
And then the first ass turned, and the second one...and one by one all asses turned on me. I looked up, and what I saw was even more embarassing. I tried to concentrate deeper into the phone...the asses were better I thought. I remained hooked to the phone until most of the standing passengers were gone (ITPl is almost the last stop).

Yeah yeah, not a great experience with grabbing eyeballs I guess!!!
Nevertheless...the phone is all worth the money.

On the way to office today

Db dropped me at the Leela Palace bus stop as usual. I catch a volvo to ITPL from there everyday while Db goes to his office at Diamond District.

I waited for almost 10-15 minutes, but no volvo turned up to the bus stop. I was getting late and the crowd was building up. Even if the volvo came in another minute, I'd probably have to travel standing till ITPL. There was this descent looking guy standing next to me waiting for the same bus impatiently, making these impatient noises every now and then and looking at his watch everuy 30 seconds.

In another minute, a bus arrived, It wasn't the A/C volvo bus, rather a battered old bus, probably the ones which goes on a longer distance like Mysore or Ooty may be. Boarding this bus was pretty much mere shan ke khilaaf, but the conductor shouting 'ITPL,ITPL,ITPL' was too provokating. The young man standing next to me hesitated for a while then asked the conductor "ITPL???" and hopped on to the bus. The bus was still waiting and the conductor just standing infront of me was chanting incessantly 'ITPL,ITPL,ITPL'. I took a closer look at the bus, plenty of seats empty, something I wouldn’t get even if I manage to catch the Volvo. It was my turn now...’ITPL???’ I queried…it was less of a query and more of loud thinking. I hopped in too.

The bus was in a real bad shape, the seats were too clumsy and there was no A/C. But there were two TV's available at the front end which were playing some Telgu movie. There was a huge traffic jam, giving all us passengers the chance to watch the full movie. At first I wasn't interested until I saw Pravu Deva on a wheel chair. Awww!!! Such a waste I thought to myself. It was a movie revolving around some dance competitions and I must say the dances were pretty breathtaking. Prabhu Deva was the guru who had lost his legs to an accident and was training a group (which also included the main lead) to win the dance competition in question. But with the ususal non-sense that any south indian movie serves its audience, there were many such scenes where I went 'What Crap!!!'
Towards the climax, the friends of the main protagonist are kidnapped to prevent them from reaching the competetion venue. The lead is shot in his leg and his shoulders and has to dance aka Basanti to save his friends. Not just he manages to do that, he also manages to dance the competition to the quarter finals, semi-finals and the final, finally winning too. And worse, people in the bus were actually hooting, whistling and shouting while the hero danced his way to glory with bullet shots on his shoulder and legs. Nagarjuna and Chiranjeevi pop in from no where to misuse and abuse the all laws ever made by any physicist.

And the final nail in the coffin...as a token of respect, the lead wants to make his handicapped Guru to do some dancing too. To my utter horror, he carries Prabhu Deva on his shoulders while Prabhu Deva's vaccum pant legs are dangling in the air and they together dance, the lead doing the leg movements and Prabhu Deva doing the hand movements, together doing the Maa-Behen of physics. Newton must be turning in his grave while the passengers in the bus cheered to the histronics.

For sure, one of my best rides to office.

Complexed life

I am getting old.
Lets call it experienced or matured to make it sound better, but it eventually means the same thing...I am getting old.
I am going to be thirty in 3 damned years...that's something man!!! Feels like I was seventeen just a couple of years back, how the hell have the 10 years gone by so quickly.

Now its time to make some serious decisions...
serious??? Now all the decisions taken in the last 27 years seems to be cake walk...choosing between buying a skirt or a jeans, candy or icecream, Homework or TV, engineering or medical, serious relationship or crush-n-bounce.
Sounds really petty stuff...right!!!

Now we have big decisions, big...that could change life forever...one mistake and sooooshhh you go!!!

My age, my experience is also going against me at the professional front.
Three years ago, I felt like a insignificant part of a big company, and just the fact I had a job to hold on to, a kind of job people fancy about was good enough to make me happy and content. Despite of the fact that there were many things around me which I would have liked to change, I learnt to accept things the way they were. But this is a strange stage of my life, where I want to take initiative to go and change things around. But as they say, its easy to find a leader and be one too, but its difficult to find the first follower. Probably in a years time I'd turn into a dumb and deaf figure in the balance sheet of my company...and eventually find my solace.

Phew!!! I have become a serial-cribber...don't you think so!!!

Among all this...there's something to go yipeeeeee about.
I think I am losing some weight finally. The long travel to ITPL everyday, the walking I get to do on the way to office and also the ghar ka khana...looks like this combination is working. My jeans got a bit loose (or has the jeans expanded???) and my double chin is almost gone.

okay lemme just say it....yipeeeeeeeeee!!!!

Hush Hush...!!!

I have a secret...a BIGGGGGG one. One that I am dying to say, but I can't and I won't say it now.
All in good time!!!

And please...I am not pregnant!!!

I am getting old

Late twenties...not so bad i guess.
For some people life starts at thirty...but I seem to be getting old.

I remember during my college days, I was often complemented on my good skin. One pipmle and it showed off as a flashy torch light...and everybody seemed come come and ask 'Hai Hai!!! Tereko pimple ho gaya ???'.

But I feel my skin is starting to rot now.
Time to fight the seven signs of agening...darkess, patchy skin and blah blah !!!

But no Olay for me puhleese, last time I spent 600 bucks on the creme last time and ended up using it for foot massage. It left my face with a string of spots.

To Bhai - On Raksha bandhan

Okay now...this is not the pic of me and Bhai (we are far more cuter....teheeehee), but the idea of putting anything else sounded too cheesy to me.
But the story comes from when we were as small and cute(may be more) as the ones in the pic. I was this innocent younger sister and you were the Kamina walla wada Bhai...you listening Bhai!!!

I would tie a Rakhi to your little wrist and you would hand me the 5 or 10 rupees that Dad gave you for the occasion, while Mom watched and smiled at her sweet duo. And as soon as she left, you would hit me hard and take the money back from me and also take 2 rupees extra as the interest for keeping the money for so long.

I am sorry my Rakhi hasn't reached you this season, I hope it reaches by today evening. But if it doesn't don't get mad at me...consider it to be my revenge for one of the above mentioned occasions. And also to get even with you each time you missed to protect me from Db, when he forcefully switched the TV off finally at 2 O' Clock in the night, or when he refused to buy me one more Tee after I had already bought 5, or when he shouted at me for not taking bath on weekends, or when I refused to take medicines or see a doctor even when I'd be terribly unwell.
I hate you both for that...from the core of my heart. **wink**

I know you have been through a lot this year and earlier too. But now that you are at your road to revival, I wish you get more happiness than you can handle from now on.

Besh Wishes on Raksha Bandhan
From you innocent little sister on her way to ultimate kameenapan.

And this is our pic...you'd agree were cuter. Don't go by his innocent looks...that was just for the camera.

Really???

Its a little late to be blogging on this...nevertheless here it goes.

It was the 13th of August, we had this independence day celebrations at our office. We were requested to wear stuff which were specific to our origins...so I was ideally supposed to wear a Sambalpuri Saree to represent Orissa. But there was something the event managers conviniently overlooked. They sent out the mail only on 12th evening...so that people like me who had blown up to considerable proportions didn't get tome to jugaad the clothes to their currently fitting sizes.
So, no Sambalpuri Sarees for me...and its not my fault either.

I turned up in a routine salwaar kameez, and changed into a saree later in the afternoon.
V is one of our organizers for the event.

V: What kinda saree is that, its got something to do with Orissa???
Me: No, just a saree. For my regional saree, the accesories don't fit me anymore.
V: Oh Okay.

After an hour.

V: You sure, the saree's nothing to do with Orissa?
Me: No, its just a fancy saree thats it.
V: Hmm...we don't have many people from our team who could participate in representing various parts of India.
Me: Hmm

Later that day, during the competetion.
I wasn't obviously participating, so I stood in a corner clicking pictures. Suddenly V notices me and

V: Hey come come.
Me: What???
V: (Pulling me to the judges) And she depicts the modern women of today dressed in a fancy saree.
Me: Hain!!!! (I have better things to wear than a saree to showcase my modenity)
Judges: (Visibly or predending to be happy) Yeah nice nice!!!
Me: Whatever!!!

Guess who is sitting wella today

Rediff news....link

Day care for adults

Db tells me, this actually exists somewhere in Chennai.

Not sure if this is a work of fiction by a notorious male brain.

Updates

I finish 6 months with my current employer today. My confirmation feedback was pretty good but it doesn't matter to me anyways. I have grown over those days when ratings, feedbacks and appraisals meant the world to me. And with this team I am quite hopeless, given the fact that I tried everything possible to bring about the improvements in the team but with no co-operation from the senior level, I got to meet only dead ends. Lets talk about innovations...shall we??? Phew!!!

Bhai has successfully completed 2 months with HCL, and I hope the success continues. With the relief coming from his job, my parents decided to meet the couple at Delhi finally, which would be their first visit to them since their wedding in feb last year. Considering the consequences I had to face when we (me and Db) paid them a visit last year, I found it strange to explain to Mom to behave herself lest she gets into an ugly situation with my SIL. Mom is a simple woman, I know she wouldn't be able to handle it if my SIL loses it and gets remotely close to what I had to face with her. So better she avoids the situation by being careful herself. Yeah!!! times are changing, the MIL has to be careful with the DIL.

In turn, my SIL is gonna come back to us after completing her MBA from Delhi. She'll be here for job hunt. See how time flies!!! Though troublesome is the last thing she is, yet its gonna bring some change in our usual lifestyle. Yet one thing that makes me happy is, because of her arrival, we got a new cubboard and also Db has been organizing the house religiously so that his sister gets a clean and organized room devoid of cables, magazines, bank/ credit card/ phone/ electricity bills being thrown around.

I have bought a new Electronic Keyboard last week, the model is called Casio CTK 700 if you care. So since last 2 weeks I have been playing various tunes, and I am getting good at it with each passing day. Soon I'd be able to upload a few tunes to my blog as well. Db is a real smartie...he likes to play the drums tune on the casio, creates good noise pollution and when its my turn to play my tunes, he hands me the headphones.

Shopped for some 3 jeans at the Lifestyle mega sale, glad to see that my waist has reduced by 2 inches but surprised to find that my weight has gone up by 2 kgs. Is inch loss directly or inversely proportional to weight gain??? Don't ask me...I have no clues...and somehow I have stopped caring too. I am just happy at the moment wearing jeans one size less than my normal.