Another story...another mishap.

It happens yet again to another man, who unwilling became the victim to the women of this generation who cannot handle her independence.

I wonder what is wrong with this generataion of women!!! Why is it so difficult to keep priorities clear, and who gives them the right to screw somebody else's life with their own. If there was somebody else who you wished to marry, but could not beacuse of any God-Damned reason, why can you not try and begin a new life with the man you finally decided to marry instead. What makes them think it is a fair decision to hang on to both, the ex-flame and the now husband...and screw all the three lifes.

Probably the idea of happiness is different for different people....yet I don't see any reasoning of a sane mind here. I feel like shaking these women and ask...What? Why? What do you want?? What were you thinking???

It did happen with my family too, and I know how devasted everyone is. Not just the man in question, his entire family goes through a lot of pain while the woman's family has to go through a sad phase of embarassment. Eventually it leads nowhere, nobody is happy. Independence for women...at the cost of what??? Is it worth it???

No, I am not against women being independent...like many people are.
Some even say that probably our ancestors were aware that women do not have the capability to handle freedom and that's precisely the reason they were dominated and kept in purdah. Now that they have broken the chain of opression enforced on them since so many years, it has been proved that women cannot handle it.

While I do agree to some extend that most women are not able to use the newly found independence responsibly, yet I also believe that the problem here is much more than just that .
Women do have evolved, yet we do have an older generation and a hypocrite societe to please. If the woman in question would have gone ahead and married the man she pleased with no opposition from her family or the socite, then I wouldn't have been here writing how she has been the cause of worry, embarassment and destruction for everybody.

Till today most of the parents do impose restrictions on the girl child, the societe continues its hipocracy towards a woman.
If a man goes around with many women, he is a stud....but when a woman does the same she is labelled...
It shockes me to find that a lot of the educated mass considers it to be a pride to have recieved huge dowries...also these people do not celebrate a girl child. If a man wants to marry a woman who is of a different caste/religion, its easier for his parents to give in while its almost an impossible task for a woman to convince her parents.
Such women, when suddenly get their independence, they obviously misuse it.

I believe since this generation has witnessed women proving themselves time and again to be as competent as men, anything that is considered a taboo for a woman has to be a taboo for a man too, while anything which is acceptable for a man has to be acceptable for us, despite being women.

Probably when the older generation would also consider us at par with the men, and would be fair to us...the women would not misuse their freedom.

I am a woman...here me roar!!!

I am writing finally, it hurts me a lot having not visited it since almost a month now.
The last few weeks have been crazy. With no exaggeration, there hasn't been any time to pee either. Its different and quite difficult, as I realize now, to be responsible myself for the deadlines. Also I have again started to change things around me, and luckily this time I am not the only person who wants some change and is willing to do something about it.

Among other things, this time around I have been at the recieving end of how women do not and to some extent cannot take their work seriously after a point. I'd be red in face when the women in the team would not turn up for the standup meetings in time most of the days on the pretext that she cooks the meals, or her MIL is here or because her husband was too much in a hurry today to drop her at office and she had to take a bus or an autorickshaw. Come'on now, you have to find a balance...I am a woman too with the all these problems and more, yet I dont create such nuisance.

But issues are more serious now. While one lady in the team is yet again on her maternity leave (3+3 months) while she returned from her last maternity leave only this february...the other one suddenly stopped coming one fine day, Since last 5 fridays, she'd been calling every friday to say that she isn't coming this week because she is expecting.
Sometime last week, while having lunch, my manager expressed his concern on key resources being unavailable as cases like mentioned above. He questioned saying if these are the issues they bring along, tell me why do I hire women in my team...I'd rather hire only men.
With all due respect to his concerns and reasons, and the fact that we women have to at at some point of time have to give importance to family and the carrer has to take a back seat...we cannot take away the fact that they are now not considered as dependable resources any more. And this too not just by the men in the team, but sorry to say for me as well. When the expecting mother is back in the team, I would never find her reliable enough to give priority work to her...at least for another year or so.

I could only reply to my manager 'If everyone starts thinking likewise, who'll give us jobs then!!!'

It bothers me that some day I would be at the recieveing end of this. Some day my team will not find me dependable and I would spend probably a year or two of my career like a vegetable. Yes, I know a lot of people to whom it doesn't matter as long as they draw their monthly salary...but it would certainly matter to me.

The previous generation, that of my mom, I found her judged on looks or how good she cooks or how clean she maintains the house or how cordially she behaves with her inlaws. But I find myself judged on all this and more. In addition people also judge me on my job,my salay my presentaion as a good hostess. The freedom as a woman has increased and with that the criterias for judging us has also increased. That is probably because we are stuck in the middle of the evolution cycle. While we have probably evolved to the other side, yet we still have a older generation to please who are stuck in between.

But its amazing how we claim to be to equal to men while there are still norms in the societe to be followed only by women.
Forget the society, I even stand by it that God Himself has been discriminating between the two sexes, and whatever litlle was left the societe took care of it, so that it would take numerous generations to bring the female species in competetion to the males. Sure, not just the ones who made the norms of the society, even the God who created us humans must have been a man himself.

True, the mentality is fast changing, men are more accomodating now and have lesser male egos, but what is the ratio of such men!!! I still see a bigger ratio of men around, and that too the educated mass who still take huge amount of dowry with pride, who wouldn't let their wifes the freedom to work or to take their own decisions, women getting reduced into cooking machines and baby bearing machines.

Hopefully,the next generation will see less of the social discrimination. Yet, the physical weakness which God chose to give to all women would never change. We as women will still need extra sick leaves every month, we would still have to take maternity breaks.

As simple or as complex as you please...

At the wrong side of twenties, I look back to recall the various problem sets that I came across at various age brackets. And I remember playing the Agony Aunt to all these problems.

I must admit I have had a pretty uncomplicated life, the reason being that I always wanted it that way. I believe I am a very uncomplicated person myself and so are my circumstances and my decisons. So the problems I had to face were mostly things I never had control on...monetary problems, joblessness and a brief heart break(for which I had nobody else but myself to blame...and I accept it with humility).

Disclaimer : I admit I am looking at just one side of the coin, probably the men or the MIL's on the other end have a different version of the story. I am just talking about the problems I have seen around at various phases of life.

During school, I have seen my friends sulk over the classmates/seniors/neighbors they had a crush on...which influenced by the then Bawllywood would magnify into love triangles, quadrangles or polygons. On one such occasion, I remember a friend who was crying her lungs out, since she was supposedly sacrificing her love for her best friend who seemed to have a crush on the same guy...all the while the guy in question was unaware of the feelings of both the ladies. Seems so childish to me now...that I was actually consoling and applauding her for her selflessness!!!
Yes, even I had a crush on several males, including a senior who was a ditto copy of Akshay Kumar...just a tad shorter and a few shades darker may be. My longest crush lasted almost a year on the most intelligent and sharpest guy in my class (intelligence has always appealed me). I remember I used to keep track of his tuition timings and I would stand and wait at the backgate of my house only to watch him pass the main road while going to the tuition classes. But I was always aware that I was never serious about any of these guys and would sooner or later find someone else whom I would find more interesting and the current ones would become history soon. So life was much simpler.

During the late teens, I found myself at the ladies hostel....
The set of problems had gone a tad level higher when the girls were more confident now than at school, and also had a good amount of male attention. This was the time when most of my friends got hooked and then was the time when there were typical teenage and relationship problems on how she expected more male attention that she was already getting, how the boyfriend was being insensitive, or how he wasn't giving enough/expensive gifts unlike the boyfriend of the roommate, on how he forgot her birthday or how they keep arguing on everything under the sun and more blah blah blah.
Me...!!! No boyfriend no problems. Only crushes which would bounce soon.
My problems were mostly monetary when I would have to borrow old books from library because I couldn't buy them, or had to do petty stuff like distributing pamphlets at malls to raise money (though I enjoyed them too) or spend long hours at the computer labs for my projects since we couldn't afford a PC at home. It pisses me off when youngsters with a high end laptop, bikes and mobiles complain about their misery because they don't have a levis jeans. Phew!!! I don't have one till date.

Soon I landed myself in Kolkata with my first job. Now the problems took a more serious angle...how the boyfriend couldn't get himself a job because of the backs he couldn't clear due to the time he wasted with her, how he has changed because he doesn't get her a rose everyday like he used to earlier (What the eff!!!), how her parents are against marrying him because he is from another caste/religion, how he isn't settled (read rich) enough to get married to while she is getting better proposals, how she believes her family culture is different to his and she believes she cannot adjust...
Well...this was the time I started going around with one my family friend, who was a US return, dollar earning, football playing chora. All was well until his mother intervened and wanted to get him married to a more sober village belle who would stay as a housewife, and like an obedient son he said 'Okay Mamma' and got married the girl he hardly knew, within a month after we broke up. My mistake, trusted the wrong guy who didn't have a vertebral column and got myself in a soup.

And then marriage happened and Db happened.
Now I have friends who have more serious problems that makes life miserable. How the MIL is a rude lady, how staying with in laws doesn't give any privacy, how the MIL's are controlling the husband like a remote control, how the husband is a 'Mamma's boy' who still can't let go of his mother's pallu, how the husband doesn't save a penny and spends all the residual money on his parents every month, how despite of having a love marriage love has flown out of the window, how coming from a nuclear family she feels all suffocated in a joint family, how balancing the personal and professional life is getting difficult but she can't quit her job because they need the money that comes from it.
As for me, yes marriage was a bit tough. Day one I woke up to responsibilities. I have always taken pride of the fact that I have never been dependent on anybody, nobody except my parents (and the DB's friend who helped Bhai when he was going through his worst crisis ever) can standup and say that I owe something to them and I would like it to remain the same till I live. But on the other hand, being the youngest in the family even I hadn't taken any responsibility myself. So phat gayee!!! But I believe it's not something I can't deal with or lemme put it another way, I think I can deal with anything that comes my way. **collars up**

But I have met another set of people who have no significant problems to talk about. They are from stinkingly rich families, have a great job, have married the man of their dreams, have accommodating in laws and leading a very easy and comfortable life. So having nothing better to do, they end up creating problems for themselves. How??? Buy a lavish house while you don't need one and start complaining how the monthly EMI's are a pain in the a** and how the in laws are so mean that they won't help pay up the money. Come'on now!!!

I remember something very valuable learnt in the simpler past. That everything is as simple as you please. Even the present.
Now, its for you to figure out what you please.

Beyond Mandir and Masjids

What difference does it make to the Mango people...whether a Mandir or Masjid is built over it.

Of what I make out of the discussions going around in office, people have moved on...they'r more worried about storing up food in case the shops are closed for a couple of days (which indeed was the case yesterday), or if they'd find a Volvo back home today, or is it safe to watch the Rajnikanth starrer ENDHIRAN this weekend. They'r all busy mind-their-own-buinesss and safeguard themselves and their family, than to be bothered about who ends up getting the piece of land.
But for sure, except for a handful of people...I see a great level of religious tolerance, or may be it-doesn't-matter kinda attitude in the so called educated mass...which is indeed a good sign.

I am happy to see how the Aam Aadmi has reacted so maturely to the Ayodhya verdict. Necessary precautions were taken while the city went on a self imposed almost-a-curfew yesterday...but over all it has been peaceful. Though these things are normally politically motivated, and also the media has been doing its bit efficiently to create unneccesary panic and airing highly provokative statements all day...yet things still look unaffected.

Is this a sign that Indians are finally getting tolerant to all religions, or are they getting mature, or indifferent, or is life getting too busy just making ends meet. Or has the judiciary and police become more efficient or is it the politicians who have finally found their conscience (certainly the media is yet to find theirs).

Whatever the case could be, its certainly welcome.
As they say...there has been enough temples and mosque, let's build a Nation now.

Top 10 lessons learnt from staying alone in my house

1. Stay online as much as you can...and bless people who ping you. It reassures you that you are not an crotchety old lady who is sitting alone in a house.

2. Get addicted to facebook or orkut. Comment on everyone's status and like everything that anybody says or does. This way you make a good chance that when you start a thread, there are people replying to it and that starts a neverending thread and kills time.

3. Order in food. Since you can't finish it all by yourself because of the limited size of our stomach and your mental calculation to check your weight...the food easily lasts for two days.

4. Write on your kitchen whiteboard 'WATCH YOUR WEIGHT...DONT ORDER FOOD' and ignore it on the weekends.

5. Do a lot of shoppping on the weekend and bill it on the credit card your husband gave you. Watch your kurta collection soar while your bank balance remains unchanged. **

6. Check your weight regularly. Notice that despite what people expected that you lose weight sulking for your husband, you have actually put on a significant no. of kilos. Blame it on the weather.

7. If you don't find the remote, find it under the pile of clothes on your bed, or the pile of unread newspaper, under the laptop, in the fridge or bathroom.

8. Get a new hair cut in some expensive beauty salon and bill it on the credit card your husband gave you. **

9. At office, keep a visible expression of being sulky and sad for being lonely at home...so that they feel guilty to give you more (any) work.

10. Ask in a friend to come and stay over on the pretext of helping her in distress, and curse yourself every single day after thinking when the hell will she leave.

(** Sport a 440 watt smile on the webcam the next day, to make your husband feel better )

The Delhi aftermath

I have a sore throat ever since I came back from Delhi...and running a fever since last two days.
Yesterday I reached office and left in half an hour since I couldn't stand the AC. A day's rest can do wonders to you. The fever is mostly gone but my throat continues the harassment.

We spent almost a good 30K on the trip...but the kinda experience I got from it is worth millions.

I am happy I got to see the real persona of people which they hide under their designer clothes, make up or the constant 'hey' 'oops' 'yeah' and 'man'. Within they are people who can stoop so low that leave you with a gaping mouth. Ever since our return Db is full of appreciations for me, believing that he is lucky to have me...but of course.

I am disappointed to see this generation being so irresponsible and callous towards their carrier and family. Also I must say they are way smarter than what we were at their age. They lie with such a straight face, have no signs of regret whatsoever. I wonder what makes them such, since I believe all generations have their share of temptations. May be easy access to things (bikes, mobiles, internet, laptops), may be the feeling that everything will be taken care of, or the Oh-I-am-so-cool attitude, or mere overconfidence. I donno.

I do not have a problem with the choices they make in life, since I have always believed that they are all adults and smart enough to make their decisions, but they should also have the guts to face the consequences...which they clearly don't have.

I am so awfully disappointed.
Yes!!! its now that I eventually realize that I am way more matured than any of those people who I thought were. I look at them and feel proud of what I was then and what I am now.

BACK FROM SASURAL

I am back from my SASURAL this morning...The experience wasn't half as bad I thought it would be. I was pretty much at ease and everyone treated me in a very loving and caring way. The biggest compliment I received was I seemed less like a BAHU and more like a daughter to everyone...it can't get better than this!!! The only issue was the weather which was horrible, I kept sweating like a pig, which took away most of the fun in the trip. If they say Kashmir is the heaven on Earth, then for sure Andhra is the hell on earth during summers. It was sooooo bloody hot, I feel the temperature rising even while thinking about it.

With my in laws, I get to taste the flavor of joint families, a concept very alien to me since we are a nuclear family back home. I like the way elders invite you home and treat you, I like the lighthearted relationship the DEVARS and BHABHIS share, I like the way cousins care for each other, pull each others legs, exchange gifts on occasions and hang out at places...and yeah gamble. You heard that right, we had a game of cards with some similar aged cousins, which was a proper gambling and lasted almost till the middle of the night. Db lost a good 120 rupees I gained almost fifly.

I visited a place called GUPTESHWAR with my family, one of the oldest Shiva temples, which was a great experience. An entire post coming up on that soon.

And yeah...not without worries.
Db's native is a small town, and his relatives not very competent with the fast growing generation. But a few kids including Db, have managed to break free from the circle and have been able to make it big in the bigger cities.
But as they say Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers...
Not everyone has the the ability to sail smooth when they take this huge leap from a small town to the fast moving metros...I see so many young people going in wrong directions and getting into things which they cannot handle, in the pretext of being a part of the smarter generation in question. Not that this is the first time that I see them, I have come across a lot of such people and also closely witnessed their plight when the time of self realization comes for them. That's the reason why I have always called them the confused generation.

And the worst part is, you can't do a thing to bail them out. Somehow they dismiss you as a older generation who don't understand their lifestyle, they have developed a mid-your-own-business kinda attitude and to make things worse then don't realize that what they are getting into and they might not be able to handle the consequences.
So you are left with nothing but just wait and watch till they realize their mistakes. And the person in question here is actually someone who might have to pay a hefty price for what she's got into...

I wish she comes out of things in the best possible way and with minimum damage done.
Yeah I do care for her and wish I could help her...but for that matter I have never been able to help anybody who was ever in her shoes...
**sigh**

THE CONFUSED GENERATION

Yeah!!! Confused...that's wot I call this generation.

Otherwise how do I explain why my friend got his so-called ex-girlfriend married to his elder brother...
Or why another one of my friend's wife chooses to continue her affair with her ex-boyfriend even after she is married to a descent family and a nice guy...and somehow his one affects me more than the first one.

I really feel like hitting her hard across her face...to call her all kinda names, she being the reason for the misery of the family so close to me.
But she doesn't deserve that.
More so, since she is a victim herself...victim of her own confusion.
I don't know what is she thinking while doing this, cheating her husband, cheating her boyfriend, or herself.
And who is the other guy kidding, romancing a now married woman.
I feel sad for the husband though, being cheated by his wife...

Forget conscience, do people not think about their own future before doing these things...
What is she up do...does she think sailing on two boats will take her anywhere at all???

I donno how to react...
I was very pissed up with the girl when I got to know about it...but now, after pondering over it for a while, all I feel for her is sympathy.

The problem is here...
These girls come from villages, from downright conservative families, where even the girls wearing pants (literally) is a taboo. Being brought up with these families, these girls leave home at at a very young age for studies and later leave to work at one of the metros or Bangalore or Pune. In an effort to be a part of the much forward culture and crowd there, they transform into confused individuals, not able to choose between the values given by their families and the culture that they are currently a part of, and hence get stuck in the middle of the evolution cycle.
Alas....there is nothing we can do about it???

My friend's life has turned into a living hell with her, and I donno how to bail him out of this. I feel so helpless, due to the sensitivity of the matter and also due to the fact that the law favors the women blindly on such matters.

Well...got to think of something and faster too.

SATYAM BREAKS EVEN

Finally Satyam stock shows up green for us.
Today the Satyam has hit the upper circuit second time in a row...gaining over 10 percent the second time.

This was our loss percentage with Satyam dated 18th May 2009...

This is the one today...

And if experts are to be believed, the share value of Satyam is expected to go up to 100 soon.

Update 11th June :
Satyam breaks the upper circuit yet again...

ON RELATIONSHIPS...Err !! !NOT REALLY!!!

We had this discussion among frenz today...on this lesser known movie called 'Ankahee', starring Aftab and Esha Deol. Aftab falls into an extra marital affair with Esha who happens to be Miss World, and he claims innocence to his daughter on the pretext that being wooed by a Miss World got too tempting to resist.

Well...I'd say fair enough. If likes of Brad Pitt, or for that matter John Abraham are craving for my attention, it’s certainly a tough choice to make. And let’s face it that for men, the choice is easier to make.

But my dear friend begs to differ.
She says why does a man have to get attracted to other women. There is absolutely no reason why he should be going after another woman, since he gets all he wants at home. And since I don’t look at a man with tainted intensions, why should he?
He He He!!!...people are actually so naive is it!!!???

I remember, Db once mentioned this girl at his office who’d dress too provocatively. And every day during their status meetings, the guys found it really difficult to keep their eyes off her assets. He was worried she might notice him someday and report an incident. He was relaxed when the girl was shifted to another team.
So, Am I supposed to feel offended or insecure!!!???

Of course, No!!!
All men without exception do look at women, and with not very platonic feelings, and if a man claims that he doesn’t look at women, then either he is lying or he is gay. Period.
So if some likes of Miss World, or Universe, or may be some real hot chick is flirting with you, it’s certainly difficult to ignore her.

What I feel sad about, is women of this generation also believe in this concept of PATI PARMESHWAR. Men these days have much more exposure than it used to be in older times, and life now is too fast to think and judge. We all need our share of independence, and also, this present generation is not half as emotionally strong as our previous generations. Also keeping at par with changing times, even the men shouldn’t expect a hundred percent loyalist women.

I do not welcome adultery, nor do I ask people to sit and mourn if you discover one. But it shouldn’t come as a rude shock.
Give your spouse enough trust and freedom so that he doesn’t have to come back and lie to you. I believe, as long as your spouse feels his freedom, and can talk about anything under the sun, you maximize your chances of a loyal spouse.

PROBLEMS...

Why there are always problems in life??? Why can't everything go according to plan???
When everything just looks good and wonderful, problems have to poke their nose into it...
But every problem contains the seeds of its own solution...It isn't that you can't see the solution, it's that you can't see the problem.

While working as a trainee at Cognizant, I had a senior named Gitanjali.

I was new to Java then, many a times I would get stuck at places, absolutely clueless. Though she was not from my team, she would go out of her way to help me out. She had a strange way of solving my problems. She wouldn't touch the keyboard, just sit next to me, and ask me to explain the flow to her, asking a few questions here and there. Once we are done once...she would tell me "Chal phir se samjha"...Then eventually while explaining her the flow again and again, I would find the bug myself.

She taught me this golden trick. When you are looking at a problem for a long time, you tend to look at it from a single dimension. So, when ever you feel that you have tried all you could to solve a problem, get hold of a BAKRA, explain the entire flow to him...even if you don't get the bug yourself, certainly he would give you a new dimension to think of it.

Not only in work, I feel in real life it holds good too. Whenever you are in bad times, your brain stops working, and you tend to get into deeper sh*t.

Whenever I have a problem I talk to my friends.

I get more dimensions of the problem, and better solutions than I can think of at that time.

Well...A life without problems would be as boring as a film without a villain.

As they say...Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to deal with them...
So, here I am fighting against all problems of my life and others, and take pride in saying "What doesn't destroy me, makes me stronger"

RUNNING A FEVER

I came across this today when I had to send a mail to my client saying that one of my team members was absent since she is RUNNING A FEVER.

Why do they say running a fever...
You can run a dog, run a car, you can a have a running nose as well...
But how can you run a fever???

For sure, English is a very FUNNY language.

Update: Db suggested a few more
Raining cats and dogs...meaning heavy rains.
I knew sometimes small creatures like frogs and fish fall from the sky during rain, since they can easily get carried up during storms...but how can it rain cats and dogs!!!

Paint the town... meaning to go out and celebrate.
????

I got some good reasoning here.

HOME ALONE…BACK TO MY SINGLE DAYS FOR SOMETIME – III

My colleagues at office argued with me last night that Surya was better than Aamir in the Tamil version of Ghajini, I managed to catch a few scenes of the same on youtube…and without any doubts…Aamir rocks!!!

What a dull day this morning!!!

While I am staying alone, getting up at nine in the morning seems too early. Half the days I skip my breakfast and the other half of the days I skip my dinner.

My alarm shot at nine today. There was no sun in the balcony, I checked and rechecked the time, since it appeared no more than seven. Damn it’s actually nine. I literally dragged myself to cook something for dinner lest I skip dinner again today. I felt like a drunken monkey.

Reached office but there isn’t too much work either. Since last two weeks I have turned quite efficient. I am quite happy with my own performance this fortnight. That matters more than what others think. I can also point out a few limitations and bugs in hibernate. Howzzat!!!!

I never knew there were so many CHINDICHORS in my office. I got a new 2GB memory card and a pair of new earphones for my phone the other day. I kept the earphones in my drawer and somehow forgot to lock my drawer. My earphones are missing this morning. GRRRRRRRRR!!!!

The entire office, the news channels, the newspapers…all are talking about just one thing…SATYAM. Dude…I have some shares worth a ten thousand with Satyam, I bought them at 138 and now they are worth just 35. Damn!!!
I had this discussion with my colleagues this evening on this, as most of them would say that Ramalinga Raju is a fraud. Lot have been said and done about the same, Satyam Computers stripped off Golden Peacock Global Award, and they have been removed from the Sensex and Nifty as well…and sure a lot more is yet to come with each passing day.

But I actually feel sad for the guy. I mean…come on…who doesn’t manipulate balance sheets. I am sure all companies do it to some extent. You cant strive in business if you are a saint.

At school we manipulated the readings in the physics lab, the teacher knew it, I am sure he would have done it when he was in our shoes.
We get adulterated stuff everywhere, the milk, the rice, the oil…you name it.
People tamper with horoscopes in marriages.
The shopping malls increase the market price by 75% and give a 50% SALE on it.
Don’t we all tamper with data at some point for personal gain.

Yes, the crime is to get caught...and that's where Satyam went wrong.

I don't advocate what Ramalinga Raju has done but for sure he is not the only one, he is the only one who got caught...yet if he is to be believed, he hasn't used the money for his personal benefits, he just wanted to prevent his company from being taken over. So all I feel for him is pity and more so towards the employees who have their jobs at stake, more so since the IT is going through the worst recession phase...and the investors like me who are losing their hard earned money.

The great wall street meltdown

Came accross a nice article on the US recession and the crisis in the finacial market explained in a very simple and interesting way. Have a look:

The great wall street meltdown

RIGHTS are RIGHT???

This weekend I was watching a program on the TV, where in the hosts of the show moved across the city of Bangalore trying to find out if the youngsters knew what were their fundamental rights as Indians. I was shocking to find that they actually did not know. I tried to recall, I think I remembered only three: right to freedom of speech, expression, religion and peaceful mass gathering. I was hell bent that I would not google it and try to remember them on my own, I tried for two days but failed to remember anymore than the ones I listed.

I read the wikipedia here which doesn’t include any of the three except the right to freedom of religion. It says all three have been included under one called right to freedom. Bad, at least I should have known this being the educated mass of India. Shame shame shame!!!

There were some interesting questions too, like given a chance, which right would you like to add to the constitution. There were real whacky answers. Many of them said there has to be a right to party late night without parental interference…can you believe this!!!
But the one I loved the most was…the right to freedom of PDA. For people who don’t understand this…PDA is Public Display of Affection. Sometime or the other, you must have caught some young couple getting cozy, or smooching in a park or other places…yeah that one!!! Youngsters want it to be fundamental right. I wonder our ancestors must be turning in their graves :).

I would love to remove one desperately, the right to peaceful mass gathering. Because the right of one should no become inconvenience to another. Almost everyday for some or the other reasons, there is a group of people protesting on the road that goes to my office. It takes me fifteen minutes to cross the road which otherwise would take less than 2-3 minutes. I genuinely believe, for gathering in a public place, there should be some kind of permit required, so that people don’t gather here and there for any damn reasons causing inconvenience to hundreds of others.

I am not sure which one would I like to add though, yeah, may be one. Yes, I would like to add another provision to the right against exploitation, right against getting exploited by auto/taxi drivers who refuse to run on meters :).

WHEN DEATH AND RAPE ARE INEVITABLE, JUST LIE BACK AND ENJOY.

Well yes. Holds good doesn’t it. It’s sometimes better to avoid fighting than run the risk of injuries. I was discussing a few problems I had with my life and how I felt so helpless not being able to do anything to change its course. Wise words, I must say and of all people it came from a friend who I wouldn’t think is half as wise.

There a few things I would love to change…but I can’t. I know that somewhere somehow people are taking advantage of me, but I can do nothing to change it. May be I can, Oh no, for sure I can, but I cant get to make myself stoop so low. But the question is why, why O why do they want to take advantage of me. If I sit back and start thinking, if I would ever deliberately try to cause inconvenience to somebody else, the answer is no and a OF COURSE NO. Then what makes any body want to enjoy at the cost of my inconvenience. I read a blog here where in he tries to analyze what makes people evil or cause harm to others.

But then how does it matter, why someone is doing something. What matters is how it is going to affect you. And if it does what can you possibly do to stop it. If eventually you realize you can’t stop it from happening, just as well lie back and enjoy the fun while you see people snatching the apple from your mouth.

One fine day, we were on the verge of an evening chat. On a lighter note I asked Db, if I and his sister had an argument and he would have to choose between me and his sister, whom he would pick. He said it would be me.

WHY??? Even if you would know that it was my fault.
He said yes. Even if I would know it’s your fault, I would still stand by you.
WHY???
Because I have to spend my entire life with you and not with my sister. Standing by you would make life simpler for me.

I look at my SIL, and she visibly agreed with her brother. She gave me the obvious look and said Of course…what else.

I try to look within myself, would I do the same thing too. If Db and my Dad had a difference of opinion over something, who would I choose. What came as an obvious answer was, I would try to find out who is correct among the two and take his side. (Though I agree I am not half as assertive as DB or even my SIL, I am not sure how exactly would I behave when put into such a situation. Pray it never comes). Because I don’t want to HAVE TO spend my life with him, I’d want to LOVE TO do so.

To which Db says, this is why I keep saying you haven’t grown up. Idealism doesn’t help. In practical life, it has to be given a backseat if you really wanna stay happy. We know we have to spend say the next 60-70 years together, so why not try to keep each other happy and make it simpler. The key to happiness is, be selfish…when its about your family vs the rest of the world, your family comes first. But when its about you vs your family, YOU stand over everything else. You have to be a little selfish to be happy, or you end up giving everybody a chance to step over your happiness to reach theirs. Since you are my family now, you stand over everything and everybody else, because I want to be happy in my life. But when its either you or me, I would probably get selfish again for the same reason, and I expect you to do the same if situation arises.

It amuses me at times, when I claim I am an idealistic person.

May be its actually not idealism that I practice, its perhaps the immaturity, the innocence that I am holding back. May be I miss the practical approach towards life.
Many a times we know what is going on is not the correct thing to do, but you have no other go other than doing it, for the sake of peace, happiness or plain and simple SELFISHNESS.

So while people make you their trail to glory and you know you can’t or don’t want to stop them, then the only way you have is sit back and enjoy them pursue their happiness and their selfishness.

We...the literate herd of India...

And how often have I heard this…Politics is a pot-hole.

But I have a question here. Even if it is a pothole, how many of us are willing to take up the responsibility to clean this pot hole…none actually. And why…because we don’t want to soil our hands or because we simply don’t care.
People like us are more concerned about their monthly paycheck and yearly appraisals and onsite assignments than being bothered by the Indian politics. How many of us actually know the stories behind the operation Blue star in 1984 and the consequences of the riots in Gujarat in 2003. Thousands of people die every year due to these communal riots which are normally planned and guided by the ruling parties…the same people whom we elect as our representatives to rule our country. I keep coming across so many people who keep blaming Indian politics, conveniently predicting that this country is headed to be doomed. But tell me how many of, we so called educated people, are actually willing to do something about it. Forget being a part of this political pot hole, how many of us use our voting rights…very very few in fact.

Talking about politics in the South, here we are lead by Karunanidhi vs JayLalitha. Karunanidhi, who has been appointed as the CM of TN five times already. Politics in TN has been a paradox. The absence of political debate can be clearly seen in the election campaign of 2006, which was predominantly based on the fight that who could bribe the voters more outrageously. Karunanidhi won with his promise of providing color televisions for all households and rice at the rate of Rs 2 per kilo.
This kind of politics is encouraged since very few of the so called educated mass take part in the elections and the non-educated mass can be easily wooed by such temptations. And the worst part is, this bribe was given from the government treasure, i.e. the money the middle class pays as taxes to the government…which is expected to be spent on the benefits of the citizen of India and not for the hopeless politicians to bribe people for votes.
Where as in Bihar we have Laloo and Rabri, who need no mention.
As I know from history, the kings who ruled India, the power came with heredity. The king when dies, his son would take over the dynasty and it went on for generations. Things look no different to me in the democratic India. All politicians children are also politicians. Motilal Nehru, Jawaharlal Nehru, Indira Gandhi, Rajiv Gandhi and now Rahul Gandhi have all become presidents of Congress Party- consistently for five generations. Rahul Gandhi is now slated to become Prime Minister of India, no questions asked.

Being a part of the literate herd of India, are we doing our duties towards our country…if not, what rights have we got to blame the politicians if they don’t to their bit. The fact is, even we as the citizens of India are running away from our responsibilities and find it so convenient to put the blame on the system. As long as, we, the educated mass of India are not going to take a stand, the situation would never improve and most certainly this country is going for a toss. 10-15 years down the line, we would all be managers in our respective MNC’s, we would have earned enough dollars, we would have married the man of our dreams, have a dream house far from the city traffic which would have a luxurious terrace, where would be conveniently reading the morning newspaper with a hot cup of tea and cribbing…”THIS COUNTRY IS GOING NOWHERE…”. You bet!!!!

Emotions vs Logic....

The other day I ran into a discussion with one of my teammates as in…What is God for you? How do you see God?

I know so many people who look for God in their prayers, temples, fasting and so on. When my friends see me not praying, not visiting temples and not fasting, they conveniently categorize me an atheist. I am not here to question the existence of God, so I am a huge believer in God, where I differ is the way I see him. I see him as a faith, I see him as a belief that someone is there to take care of me and whatever is happening is happening for good, a fence that divides right from wrong, a fear that someone is watching, which stops me when I do wrong, and an encouragement to do good. He is in no Temple, no prayers, no fasting…he is within me, my faith, my belief, my fear, my encouragement, my CONSCIENCE and I worship them all and that’s God for me.

So is God the holy figure with a halo on his head sitting somewhere in the sky on a lotus flower with a rat or frog or swan as his bearer? Is he the Lord Vishnu who in his “Vamana Avatar” measured the earth and heaven in two strides? Or is it Lord Rama who is believed to have made the “Rama Sethu” with a battalion of monkeys?

Can we dismiss “Vamana Avatar” by saying that it’s difficult to believe that a man could step on entire earth and heaven on one foot? It is easier to believe that Narsimha, the incarnation of Vishnu never existed because it is hard to believe that a man could actually take the shape of a lion. Nobody actually asserts that the “Asuras” and “Devas” actually churned the sea using a mountain and a snake with a tortoise as a base to get “Amruta”. Also there is no proof of Lord Rama’s existence. He is said to have existed in the Treta Yuga which is some 1.75 million years ago when Homo Sapiens(Humans) were not supposed to be existing on the planet. At that time there existed Proto Humans whose brain size was much smaller to ours and you could categorize them into apes.

But we Hindus tend to believe that our epics are science in itself. And in a country like India is, we cannot dare challenge this science. There are certain believes that our forefathers carried and in they are still being carried till date without any scientific backbone behind. The caste system for example, there were major 4 castes based on the roles they played in the society then....the Brahmans , the Khastriya, the Vaysa and the Sudras. The Brahmans were into Puja Patha and lived on alms, Khastriya were the rulers and warriors, Vaysas were the traders and Sudras were the untouchables who were supposed to do mean jobs. But I see no Brahmans doing religious rituals these days, no Khastriyas fighting with a sword in hand, Vyasas and Sudras are going places with the kind of reservations that our generous government has provided them. So basing on today’s scenario why can’t we redefine our caste system basing on the roles we play in the society today…lets divide ourselves as Software Engineers, Doctors, Bankers, Army Men, Business Men and so on. Why carry the burden of the earlier caste system that doesn’t exist today. It doesn’t help you any way, just helps the politicians to give mouthwatering reservation quotas to the so called backward classes and the reservations seems to increase by each election.

I am not here to question the existence of God or caste system. The point I am trying to make is why are we still following those things which hold no scientific backbone. Why do we have to carry those things which pull us backward and not let us move ahead or grow in life? Why aren’t we open to logic? Don’t you think its high time now?

IS INFOSYS TAKING OVER CAPGEMINI???

There were rumors of a possible takeover of Capgemini. And that too by Infosys — the Indian tech giant that has grown organically, setting up centers in most major delivery geographies. Yet, Infosys has been slow in the acquisitions area compared to its rivals Wipro (with its now famed “string of pearls” approach to acquisitions) and TCS.

Capgemini is the largest IT company in Europe with a turnover of Rs 42,350 crore in FY07 (year ending December), which is more than three times the revenues of Infosys which stood at Rs 12,699 crore during FY07. But the FY07 net profit for Infosys stood at Rs 3845 crore, which is almost, double that of Capgemini's. And also it had shortly acquired Kanbay which had a good turnover and sound consulting practice

So is it beneficial for Infosys to bid for the company?

Infosys management has said in the past that they’re looking at acquisitions as a means to break into new markets. And Europe, with its high growth rates and the advantage of a currency that is strong against the rupee, unlike the dollar, is a region that Indian tech firms are eager to tap into.

I believe it going to be a very costly affair for Infy, more over there would be lot’sa issues between Infy & Capgemini(CG) on Integrating businesses and creating sync among resource management. though mkt cap & profit Margins is a plus for Infy but CG is a superior to Infy in all aspects of IT business be it manpower quality, turnover, client base, area of operation, value size of deals, International brand equity etc.

SHAADI KA LADOO

Well…the other day we got into this discussion.
The girls kept complaining that they don’t want to get married because they feel they would lose their freedom. I am sure my friends are gonna kill me when they read this because, probably I am the only girl who believes in the vise versa.

I believe on the contrary, that its men who lose their freedom. Poor guys can’t come late in the night, cant booze with their friends all night, they have to arrange for the dammed grocery and stuff, expenses increases while adventure in life keeps decreasing, both exponentially. And the worst I heard about my cousin who was a sports freak, has ended up watching the infamous EKTA KAPOOR brand with his wife. Pathetic naa !!!

And now let’s look at the other side of the coin. Before marriage every girl is a CINDRELLA. But after marriage they just turn into a WASHING MACHINE, DISH CLEANING MACHINE, COOKING MACHINE…and then they don’t even realize when this CINDRELLA has turned into KANTA BAI. Still I would say that, the guarantee period for all marriages is 1 year, and after that it actually depends on how well you can handle it.

But I still believe…YEH SHAADI KA LADOO HAI,JO KHAYA WOH PACHTAYA,JO NAHIN KHAYA WHO BHI PACHTAYA….

TOH KYUN NA KHA KE PACHTAYEN…