What an end to this year

Cold, cough and fever. What an end to this year...
I haven't been to office ince last two days, and mostly not going tomorrow also. And what the hell...I am al alone at ome watching back to back episodes of CID.
I had such a terrible chest pain today that I almost thought I had an attack.

It all started with my sudden fascination to belly dancing. I downloaded the tutorial videos from youtube and started with the basic stretching exercises. The body pain and the sneezing started almost immediately. The rest of the issues started the next day.

With my vaccation to my hometown Rourkela getting cancelled, and such a deterioting health, it can't get any worse this new year. :{{

My year revisited - 2010 is coming to an end

Another week, and the year is gone by.
Its been a quite happening year, many major decisions taken, many events that affect life forever and the bitter taste of how compromises feel like.

Let me pen them down, the major events of 2010

The job switch : 8th Feb, I decided to call it quits, I quit my job and joined here. I was quite skeptical about this job profile and intended only to stay till I get a better offer. But I did end up staying here despite of the crappy project and team and outdated technologies. Why??? probably I would be able to answer that next year.

Bhai gets a job : After more than a year of hardship, Bhai finally landed with a job at HCL. It not only boosted his confidence, and brought an end to misery of the entire family which made us all lose sleep for all these days, but also fixed most of his issues in his personal life as well...or so I'd like to believe.

Db's Australia trip : Db visited Australia for work, and stayed almost 3 months. We got to have a taste of singlehood again, yet it was necessary not just because we needed the money that came from it...also to realize that we do not want to stay away from each other for such a long time ever again.

We bought a house : A decision that affected us like never before. To buy this house of our dreams, We took up a home loan for 40 lakhs, which we are paying up each month. Most of our savings are gone and we find ourselves cutting on many little things that we desire. But as they say, you cannot have everything...to gain something, you have to lose something else.

A realization : I realized eventually that being polite and nice doesn't help. This is one trait that could make you proud of yourself, but the world doesn't need it. You could probably do things for people considering them as your duty towards them, or empathizing on their situation but the feeling also has to be mutual. It can't be one-sided. I somehow don't find the reflection of my empathy on the other side, which makes me feel I am being taken advantage of. All was well, till I started getting uncomfortable of the fact that my kindness is being taken as my weakness/ foolishness. I am not a fool, its just that I cannot bring myself to hurt people who matter or should matter. But clearly now that the feeling is not mutual. So its time to take a stand and get as selfish as I can get.

And finally : Its my maid who triggered it, though she is not the only one...she was just the final nail in the coffin.

Maid : Didi...why don't you consider expanding your family?

Me: We have enough responsibilities now, lets finish them off first. Then probably we'd have time to think about ourselves.

Maid : Hmm...(she understands!!!) But you should think about yourself also naaa. A kid will bring happiness to both of you.

Me : Achaa...and who'd take care of that happiness??? We are both too busy with our jobs. I cant quit mine...we need the money that comes from it.

Maid : Main hoon naa (Aila SRK!!! After cooking, cleaning and dusting...she wants to extend her services to baby sitting). I'll handle everything, you don't worry at all.

Hmm!!! Maidy dear, you were the only one who was pending to coax me into it. And now that my parents, Db parents, my relatives, Db's relatives, our neighbours, my parents neighbours, Db's parents neighbours, my collegues, Db's collegues, the neighbouring cats, dogs, cows, mosquitoes, cockroaches and at last my maid also wants it...I finally give up.

Next year its is...now will you puhleeeze stop bothering me!!!

foggy at bangalore

At 7 in the morning, my alarm shoots. I have oiled my hair last night to have a hair wash today. The last two days have been quite sunny so I expected it to be the sasme today. I open the balcony door and 'Shit !!!' I go.
Db wakes up to it 'What's wrong?' he queries
'Come and have a look.'
He walks up to the balcony and 'Wow !!!' he goes.
'What's wow about it??'
'What's shit about it???'
'I have to wash my hair'
'Your problem, I told you so'

What we saw outside the balcony was a rare scene ion Bangalore. At least I havent seen it in the three years that I have been here.

And given below are more pictures of the fateful day. Db handed me his phone to click pictures around while he was driving. Wish he'd be half that enthusiastic to click my pictures. Sigh!!!

The Ejipura Signal

The inner ring road

The EGL campus

The Diamond District (Db's office)

I changed the blog header picture

Now this is what features in my blog title. I hung the picture here in order to keep track in case I happen to change the picture again.

Db wasn't too impressed by it.

He believed this picture doesn't depict me in any way. Contrary to the image of this woman walking carefully in a beach, he visualises me as someone who would be jumping and splashing around...basically creating nuisance.

We tried to find pictures on keywords like 'impulsive' or 'unpredictable' kinds...but niether caught our attention.

So be it for the time being.

It backfired...

Always believed a developer’s job is way tougher than any of the BA's and QA's.
I have been actively involved with testing as well in my previous projects, and I realized the biggest challenge with testing is to try and keep yourself interested. With this, Db has ever been criticizing that I do not respect the job that others do, while only giving credibility to my own job.

I beg to differ. It’s not that I do not give any integrity to testers and BA's, it’s just that I feel their's is a job even I can do, and to some extend I do as well...as a developer we do have a descent domain knowledge and we are involved in testing as well, maybe not as profoundly as the specialized people with the corresponding designations, but certainly if need be, I can with some effort fill in their shoes. But can a BA or a tester do what a developer can...can they solve technical issues or develop modules like us!!!
Yet, particularly in this project, I am amazed to see how BA's and testers behave as our bosses just because one provides us requirements while the other is supposed to review and find faults with what we have developed. They have to be spoonfed with everything from starting their servers, to creating their paths as well as cleaning up old data from their databases. Blasphemous!!!

Yes, I did try to bring about some changes in the team, to be able to change their mindsets and reduce the dependencies on the developers. I was even successful to some extend despite having very limited support from people in the team who were resistant to change. With the inclusion of some more new people, things were fairly smoother.

Yet, I am cribbing.

Because, I find the responsibilities of the change all coming to me while the credit is going to others.I was all game for the inclusion of the TestOlympics in the team. It would help us in the long run to identify more bugs and deliver bug free applications. But because I was game for it, I was assigned the task to prepare the platforms for 6 domains, I even participated in the game to raise bugs and now that we have 52 bugs just by including 30% of the application for the scope of the game, the BA’s happily raised them in the Bug tracking tool and assigned them to me. While the hard work is all mine the credit goes to somebody else.

How can we expect people to be proactive in continous improvement in the team when very obviously one section of the team is clearly overworked than the other, while the other section enjoys the credit for bringing in the change. With what has come out of the recent event, the developers are much more skeptical of trying anything new...at least I am.

Murphy's law it is

If you have four pairs of socks in a drawer, what is the probability to find a correct pair in four picks?
Mathematically, I don't care...but practically its zero. More so, when its early in the morning and you have to catch a bus to office and you are already late....all the four picks are gonna give you a different sock each time.

For the lesser mortal people like us, the only law that works is the Murphy's law.

La Français

Je me présente.
Mon nom est Mansi. J'ai 27 ans. Je suis un ingénieur. Je suis marié. Mon mari est un ingénieur ainsi. Son nom est Db. J'aime écrire des blogs où je me connecter mes pensées à différentes phases de ma vie. Je déteste la circulation dans Bangalore. Je rêve d'acheter une masion dans Bangalore.

Okay...now that was french. I have been burning my morning sleep on weekends and taking french lessons since almost a month now...and above is most of the french I have learnt till now. To decrypt the above please copy the same here.

Talking about languages, I am well versed with English, Hindi, Oriya, Bengali and to some extend Punjabi too. I like to learn new languages (Je aime apprende nouvelles langues). Yet French is a language I hate (Pourtant, Je déteste français), not just because its a tongue twister but also because what you write is not what you pronounce. Most of the words sound all similar to me and as if you were just blowing air out to somebody.

Yet, it worked...when one of the clients was here recently. He seemed impressed when I spoke in some toota-foota french with him. So, see its worth it!!!

I am a woman...here me roar!!!

I am writing finally, it hurts me a lot having not visited it since almost a month now.
The last few weeks have been crazy. With no exaggeration, there hasn't been any time to pee either. Its different and quite difficult, as I realize now, to be responsible myself for the deadlines. Also I have again started to change things around me, and luckily this time I am not the only person who wants some change and is willing to do something about it.

Among other things, this time around I have been at the recieving end of how women do not and to some extent cannot take their work seriously after a point. I'd be red in face when the women in the team would not turn up for the standup meetings in time most of the days on the pretext that she cooks the meals, or her MIL is here or because her husband was too much in a hurry today to drop her at office and she had to take a bus or an autorickshaw. Come'on now, you have to find a balance...I am a woman too with the all these problems and more, yet I dont create such nuisance.

But issues are more serious now. While one lady in the team is yet again on her maternity leave (3+3 months) while she returned from her last maternity leave only this february...the other one suddenly stopped coming one fine day, Since last 5 fridays, she'd been calling every friday to say that she isn't coming this week because she is expecting.
Sometime last week, while having lunch, my manager expressed his concern on key resources being unavailable as cases like mentioned above. He questioned saying if these are the issues they bring along, tell me why do I hire women in my team...I'd rather hire only men.
With all due respect to his concerns and reasons, and the fact that we women have to at at some point of time have to give importance to family and the carrer has to take a back seat...we cannot take away the fact that they are now not considered as dependable resources any more. And this too not just by the men in the team, but sorry to say for me as well. When the expecting mother is back in the team, I would never find her reliable enough to give priority work to her...at least for another year or so.

I could only reply to my manager 'If everyone starts thinking likewise, who'll give us jobs then!!!'

It bothers me that some day I would be at the recieveing end of this. Some day my team will not find me dependable and I would spend probably a year or two of my career like a vegetable. Yes, I know a lot of people to whom it doesn't matter as long as they draw their monthly salary...but it would certainly matter to me.

The previous generation, that of my mom, I found her judged on looks or how good she cooks or how clean she maintains the house or how cordially she behaves with her inlaws. But I find myself judged on all this and more. In addition people also judge me on my job,my salay my presentaion as a good hostess. The freedom as a woman has increased and with that the criterias for judging us has also increased. That is probably because we are stuck in the middle of the evolution cycle. While we have probably evolved to the other side, yet we still have a older generation to please who are stuck in between.

But its amazing how we claim to be to equal to men while there are still norms in the societe to be followed only by women.
Forget the society, I even stand by it that God Himself has been discriminating between the two sexes, and whatever litlle was left the societe took care of it, so that it would take numerous generations to bring the female species in competetion to the males. Sure, not just the ones who made the norms of the society, even the God who created us humans must have been a man himself.

True, the mentality is fast changing, men are more accomodating now and have lesser male egos, but what is the ratio of such men!!! I still see a bigger ratio of men around, and that too the educated mass who still take huge amount of dowry with pride, who wouldn't let their wifes the freedom to work or to take their own decisions, women getting reduced into cooking machines and baby bearing machines.

Hopefully,the next generation will see less of the social discrimination. Yet, the physical weakness which God chose to give to all women would never change. We as women will still need extra sick leaves every month, we would still have to take maternity breaks.

As simple or as complex as you please...

At the wrong side of twenties, I look back to recall the various problem sets that I came across at various age brackets. And I remember playing the Agony Aunt to all these problems.

I must admit I have had a pretty uncomplicated life, the reason being that I always wanted it that way. I believe I am a very uncomplicated person myself and so are my circumstances and my decisons. So the problems I had to face were mostly things I never had control on...monetary problems, joblessness and a brief heart break(for which I had nobody else but myself to blame...and I accept it with humility).

Disclaimer : I admit I am looking at just one side of the coin, probably the men or the MIL's on the other end have a different version of the story. I am just talking about the problems I have seen around at various phases of life.

During school, I have seen my friends sulk over the classmates/seniors/neighbors they had a crush on...which influenced by the then Bawllywood would magnify into love triangles, quadrangles or polygons. On one such occasion, I remember a friend who was crying her lungs out, since she was supposedly sacrificing her love for her best friend who seemed to have a crush on the same guy...all the while the guy in question was unaware of the feelings of both the ladies. Seems so childish to me now...that I was actually consoling and applauding her for her selflessness!!!
Yes, even I had a crush on several males, including a senior who was a ditto copy of Akshay Kumar...just a tad shorter and a few shades darker may be. My longest crush lasted almost a year on the most intelligent and sharpest guy in my class (intelligence has always appealed me). I remember I used to keep track of his tuition timings and I would stand and wait at the backgate of my house only to watch him pass the main road while going to the tuition classes. But I was always aware that I was never serious about any of these guys and would sooner or later find someone else whom I would find more interesting and the current ones would become history soon. So life was much simpler.

During the late teens, I found myself at the ladies hostel....
The set of problems had gone a tad level higher when the girls were more confident now than at school, and also had a good amount of male attention. This was the time when most of my friends got hooked and then was the time when there were typical teenage and relationship problems on how she expected more male attention that she was already getting, how the boyfriend was being insensitive, or how he wasn't giving enough/expensive gifts unlike the boyfriend of the roommate, on how he forgot her birthday or how they keep arguing on everything under the sun and more blah blah blah.
Me...!!! No boyfriend no problems. Only crushes which would bounce soon.
My problems were mostly monetary when I would have to borrow old books from library because I couldn't buy them, or had to do petty stuff like distributing pamphlets at malls to raise money (though I enjoyed them too) or spend long hours at the computer labs for my projects since we couldn't afford a PC at home. It pisses me off when youngsters with a high end laptop, bikes and mobiles complain about their misery because they don't have a levis jeans. Phew!!! I don't have one till date.

Soon I landed myself in Kolkata with my first job. Now the problems took a more serious angle...how the boyfriend couldn't get himself a job because of the backs he couldn't clear due to the time he wasted with her, how he has changed because he doesn't get her a rose everyday like he used to earlier (What the eff!!!), how her parents are against marrying him because he is from another caste/religion, how he isn't settled (read rich) enough to get married to while she is getting better proposals, how she believes her family culture is different to his and she believes she cannot adjust...
Well...this was the time I started going around with one my family friend, who was a US return, dollar earning, football playing chora. All was well until his mother intervened and wanted to get him married to a more sober village belle who would stay as a housewife, and like an obedient son he said 'Okay Mamma' and got married the girl he hardly knew, within a month after we broke up. My mistake, trusted the wrong guy who didn't have a vertebral column and got myself in a soup.

And then marriage happened and Db happened.
Now I have friends who have more serious problems that makes life miserable. How the MIL is a rude lady, how staying with in laws doesn't give any privacy, how the MIL's are controlling the husband like a remote control, how the husband is a 'Mamma's boy' who still can't let go of his mother's pallu, how the husband doesn't save a penny and spends all the residual money on his parents every month, how despite of having a love marriage love has flown out of the window, how coming from a nuclear family she feels all suffocated in a joint family, how balancing the personal and professional life is getting difficult but she can't quit her job because they need the money that comes from it.
As for me, yes marriage was a bit tough. Day one I woke up to responsibilities. I have always taken pride of the fact that I have never been dependent on anybody, nobody except my parents (and the DB's friend who helped Bhai when he was going through his worst crisis ever) can standup and say that I owe something to them and I would like it to remain the same till I live. But on the other hand, being the youngest in the family even I hadn't taken any responsibility myself. So phat gayee!!! But I believe it's not something I can't deal with or lemme put it another way, I think I can deal with anything that comes my way. **collars up**

But I have met another set of people who have no significant problems to talk about. They are from stinkingly rich families, have a great job, have married the man of their dreams, have accommodating in laws and leading a very easy and comfortable life. So having nothing better to do, they end up creating problems for themselves. How??? Buy a lavish house while you don't need one and start complaining how the monthly EMI's are a pain in the a** and how the in laws are so mean that they won't help pay up the money. Come'on now!!!

I remember something very valuable learnt in the simpler past. That everything is as simple as you please. Even the present.
Now, its for you to figure out what you please.

The Pizza in the making

A very happy diwali to all.

And the long weekend passed by

Hey good folks of the planet...

That was the long weekend that passed giving way to another long weekend for Diwali...and that's the good part.

This long weekend, most of my early morning sleeping time was mercilessly consumed by my french lessons. French, as I would love to hate it is much more tricky than I thought. While they spell it something, they pronounce it something entirely different. What the Eff!!!
Suddenly all this idea of taking French lessons seems so bad to me. But the sad part is, its a 60 hours session...and only 12 hours is completed by now...and considering the fact that its only on weekends, I almost of 2 more months to go...boo hoo hoo!!!

This weekend we also happened to visit the house of one of my most loyal (and perhaps the only one) reader of my blog. His house which he also happens own by paying a hefty price to a premium builder, was as unkept as a haystack. After we finished cleaning the house it eventually stared looking like sweet home and we throughly enjoyed the home on the 15th floor.
Ah !!! I want my house too ASAP.
Oh didn't I tell you the secret I was keeping was the 2BHK apartment I bought from the Purvankara builders. Its called the Purva Skywood located Off Sarjapur Road. The only catch is, its under construction and would be handed over to us only in 3 years.

The office is hauntingly empty today with most of the junta celebrating Diwali in their natives. The cafeteria is echoing while the restrooms are surprisingly very neat. Looks like the world has come to an end and we are the only lone survivers. And then we have this lousy weather where all I can think of is Mom serving me a hot cup of tea with some yummmm pakodas.
But that is not to be. I am to sit here in my lonesome cubicle and having nothing to do.

My calorie day

Day started well with Db joining the club of people who tell me that I seem to have lost weight.

Coming from Db, it was something to be taken into account seriously, since this is the first time he has said something like this. Cho Chweet...Maar Java Gud Kha ke !!!
So lost I have...I believe it!!!

Hadn't packed my b'fast today, so thought should have the minimum caloried idlis but ended up having a dosa. While returning from the ITPL mall, pictured somebody grabbing a choco frappe and the devil got better on me. Carried a choco frappe to my desk much to the wonder of everbody who had complemented me on looking a few pounds lighter yesterday.
Friday is our official team lunch day...but since quite some months I have been getting my lunch nevertheless. But today was an exception...so I had to join the team despite of my intention to have little or no lunch today. Ended up having Thai noodles...why???because it was cheap...v cheap and I could easily distribute it to others!!!
And then my manager proposed to give us an icecream treat. Ah!!! Perfect timing!!! I tried to convince him to postpone it to next week but it did not work. Disregarding my Brahmin genes which drives us to take poison too if it comes for free,I tried to wriggle out of the icecream parlour...but he coaxed me into it(I feel v strongly that he is quite fond of me). So a hot chocolate fudge it was!!!

I am sorry guys...to everybody who gave me this finally-you-seem-to-be-losing-weight kinda encouraging gestures, it doesn't seem to work...it never has and probably never will.

**Sigh**

Back from Sasural

We finally came back from sasural yesterday afternoon.

With the kinda horrific stories I have coming accross from my friends, who seem to to be terribly troubled by MIL's and SIL's...I think I have a got a lot better deal than others in terms of in laws. But its human nature to keep asking for more...

I have basically had a city bred life in a nuclear family, while my in laws are a whole bunch of relatives, closely knit together who seem to have a say over anything and eveything. The lifestyle is far from being like in cities and while my Mum is at the extreme end of cleaniness, my MIL stands at the other extreme end. While inlaws are more into rituals and stuff like that, my family has been pretty much liberal with such things.
It works in certain ways...while my inlaws expect us to be present at most of the occasions where eleborate puja paath and family gettogethers are done, my parents appreciate us when we join them at the new year party at the club. So its easier to divide our stay at both the families...we end up attending the puja during Dussera, Diwali or Rath Yatra at inlaws place and celebrate the New Year and Christmas celebrations with my Dad and Mum.
So convinient!!! And no one is complaining...

And now that we are back...it feels there is no place like Bangalore and no home like the one that you yourself have set up...errr..let's say...messed up.

Among other updates, as I had expected, the release is still not done yet and whether I like it or not eventually I am gonna be a part of this release. Phew!!!

The management seems to have lost the painting that I had submitted for the painting competetion, and niether did I win any prize for the same. So all lose-lose here.

Before leaving for Sasural I could feel a cavity in my upper jaw, Db crosschecked and told me there were two cavities and when I checked with the Dentist yesterday she told me it was three.
So some good painful days coming soon in trying to fix the tooth decay.

A battle lost always

This is one battle I never seem to win, no matter who my opponent is.

Figure this with my Bhabhi on doing any household task :

Bhabhi : Leave it!!! I’ll do it.

Me : No, Its okay..I’ll do it.

Bhabhi : Its okay…you take rest…I’ll do it.

Me : No…Its okay…you take rest…I’ll do it.

Bhabhi : No no no…I’ll do it.

Me : Okay

And the tables turned when I am the Bhabhi :

Me : Leave it!!! I’ll do it.

SIL : No, Its okay..I’ll do it.

Me : Its okay…you take rest…I’ll do it.

SIL : No…Its okay…you take rest…I’ll do it.

Me : No no no…I’ll do it.

SIL : Its okay Bhabhi…you take rest…I’ll do it.

Me : Okay

I wonder why can’t ever win this battle with anyone.

But Pappu can't dance saala...

A little late for this post though. It’s on the annual day dance competition at office.
Not too good, not too bad.

I think all of them were good dancers and I appreciate their courage and sportsmanship of coming on stage. But many of them didn’t know the tricks of the trade.

For a solo dance the trick is to use the stage in order to keep the audience engaged. Also it’s very important to maintain a good energy level on stage…it you sleepwalk through the show, so will the audience. Most of them danced through as if they hadn’t had food since last three days.

Somehow, I am a not so impressed when people take advantage of their classical training in dance. I think that’s giving them undue advantage over people who are not trained and only use their spontaneity on stage. So despite of the fact that I like the classical dance bit in the competition, I would stay away from giving it any credit.

As for the group dance, the trick is synchronization. You need not necessarily have complex steps but you need to coordinate properly, in terms of movements as well as the energy levels that should also be similar in a group…which was very much missing in all the group events. Also to keep the audience interested, you should make as many formations as possible and not just dance at one place.

Sigh!!! Lita yaar!!! How I wish you were here, we could have shown them how exactly you can set the stage on fire. Without my perennial partner, dance is something that looks so alien to me.
Hum bhi toh dikayen ki ball boundry ke bahar kaise jaati hai!!!

This And That...

Its been an eventful week, this one and the last week.

How I wished I could put up a few pics from the 'Retro Dressing' competition at office in my blog. But I won't because somehow in all the pics I look like an overblown baloon.
I have always been aware of the fact that I am a photographer's nightmare, since the day I visited a professional photographer to click my matrimony pics. He was oblidged to click a few good pics of me since I paid him a fortune for the job. I saw him struggling to get me friendly to the camera but the end result was still me looking like a baby elephant.
Db maintains that he selected my photo to meet up because he believed since I being myself so huge I wouldn't reject him, he himself being 92 kgs back then.
But sad...I could never ever have any good pics.

I am participating in the painting competition today, I hope my painting wins something at least...its not too bad I believe, coming from a self trained painter.

We have a release next Wednesday and I am so happy I wouldn't be around then. Though going to Sasural is not the ideal holiday I would want, but I am happy with anything that keeps me away from this release. Its going to be real messy this time, so 'if you cant face it, escape it'.
Though escaping it was not actually my plan. The release was to be done on 25th September, and I had planned my holidays well after that and booked my tickets well in advance. I am not really to be blamed if the release dates kept postponing.
You know what!!! I have a gut feeling that the release would still be pending when I return on the 26th.

Okay anyway, headed to the homeland state in two days...and hopefully will have a few good pics to update.

Beyond Mandir and Masjids

What difference does it make to the Mango people...whether a Mandir or Masjid is built over it.

Of what I make out of the discussions going around in office, people have moved on...they'r more worried about storing up food in case the shops are closed for a couple of days (which indeed was the case yesterday), or if they'd find a Volvo back home today, or is it safe to watch the Rajnikanth starrer ENDHIRAN this weekend. They'r all busy mind-their-own-buinesss and safeguard themselves and their family, than to be bothered about who ends up getting the piece of land.
But for sure, except for a handful of people...I see a great level of religious tolerance, or may be it-doesn't-matter kinda attitude in the so called educated mass...which is indeed a good sign.

I am happy to see how the Aam Aadmi has reacted so maturely to the Ayodhya verdict. Necessary precautions were taken while the city went on a self imposed almost-a-curfew yesterday...but over all it has been peaceful. Though these things are normally politically motivated, and also the media has been doing its bit efficiently to create unneccesary panic and airing highly provokative statements all day...yet things still look unaffected.

Is this a sign that Indians are finally getting tolerant to all religions, or are they getting mature, or indifferent, or is life getting too busy just making ends meet. Or has the judiciary and police become more efficient or is it the politicians who have finally found their conscience (certainly the media is yet to find theirs).

Whatever the case could be, its certainly welcome.
As they say...there has been enough temples and mosque, let's build a Nation now.

Just a thought...

If I decide to open a resturant someday...what do i call it???
....

ANYWHERE ANYTHING

Because, on an average when you ask people what they wanna have, they say ANYTHING...and when you ask people where they wanna have food, they say ANYWHERE...

Sleeping like a log

I am writing this blog because I have nothing better to do and internet is free at office.
This is an incident 6 years and 15 kgs ago...

A typical winter mid-night at hostel, we are all draped in our warm blankets/rajai's and snoring away to glory. Suddenly I felt something near my feet, may be I thought it was a pile of clothes or something, so I just kicked it to push it out of my lazy sleep. What ever it was, it fell on the snoring Lil's face with a thumppppp...and hell broke loose.
Ah...what a noisy dream, why is everybody shouting in my dream!!!?

Lil has a very vunerable sleep, she wakes up even when I turn a page of my book and yells at me...'can't you turn pages quietly???' and I go '@##$%^&^'. She can be quite troublesome if you disturb her sleep, so we normally maintain decorom while she is sleeping. And on that fateful night when something thumped right on her face, she woke up screaming so loudly, she could have brought the hostel ceiling down. My other roomie Supi woke up too. They rushed to swith the lights on...it was a CAT, an UGLY BLACK CAT !!! Now the combined effect 'Mile Sur Mera Tumhara' and they kept screaming incesantly while jumping on their respective beds, so much to bring the girls from the adjacent room to ours.
A bunch of five girls trying to drive the cat out, jumping screaming and giggling all the way at midnight...takes half an hour to succeed.

And it was revenge time, Lil turned to me and I let loose a lazy snore. Enough to get her into one of her ugly moods, she pulled me, brought me to sit on my bed and everybody gave me a piece of their mind venting out their frustration on me for being woken up from their sleep. And when everybody left I went back to what I had been doing best...snoring.

I woke up a little not-too-fresh in the morning. I had had a bad noisy dream last night. I woke up Lil lest she misses the college bus. While we got ready I asked her the question of the century...
'Oye...Kal raat kkoi aaya tha kya??' (Did somebody come into the room last night ???)

I have an iPhone

No really I do...

Only its called an sciphone, has no wifi or multitouch, the camera is terrible, doesn't have the half eaten apple icon on it and costs only 2500 INR odd...one of the amazing copies that only China can churn out.
We had been to the SP road last night to look for some basic dual sim phone and we came accross this. This one totally swept me off my feet.
And...Maa Kasam, every single person in office whom I showed this phone, started with rolling their eyes on me with this people-have-so-much-money-to-spare look until I told them it was a cheap copy of the revered iPhone...and it gets me a lot of attention otherwise too.

Check this out...
I barely managed to grab one of the weird seats on the Volvo, the ones just infront of the backdoor of the bus. Its a weird place, you tend to see the asses of the standing passengers of the bus. As the bus started filling up, I could see more and more asses targetting me. What if they unite and target their natural gases at me...I could be knocked out for several hours. I tried to close my eyes, but the sudden jerks brought me back to the reality every now and then. Having nothing better to do, I started reading the labels on their asses...I mean the labels on their trousers...Arrow, Van Heusen and unknown brands like DeZire, Crimson and even RockStar...I chuckeled to that.

Ah...too boring...time to explore my new iPhone (I insist on calling it an iPhone).
And then the first ass turned, and the second one...and one by one all asses turned on me. I looked up, and what I saw was even more embarassing. I tried to concentrate deeper into the phone...the asses were better I thought. I remained hooked to the phone until most of the standing passengers were gone (ITPl is almost the last stop).

Yeah yeah, not a great experience with grabbing eyeballs I guess!!!
Nevertheless...the phone is all worth the money.

On the way to office today

Db dropped me at the Leela Palace bus stop as usual. I catch a volvo to ITPL from there everyday while Db goes to his office at Diamond District.

I waited for almost 10-15 minutes, but no volvo turned up to the bus stop. I was getting late and the crowd was building up. Even if the volvo came in another minute, I'd probably have to travel standing till ITPL. There was this descent looking guy standing next to me waiting for the same bus impatiently, making these impatient noises every now and then and looking at his watch everuy 30 seconds.

In another minute, a bus arrived, It wasn't the A/C volvo bus, rather a battered old bus, probably the ones which goes on a longer distance like Mysore or Ooty may be. Boarding this bus was pretty much mere shan ke khilaaf, but the conductor shouting 'ITPL,ITPL,ITPL' was too provokating. The young man standing next to me hesitated for a while then asked the conductor "ITPL???" and hopped on to the bus. The bus was still waiting and the conductor just standing infront of me was chanting incessantly 'ITPL,ITPL,ITPL'. I took a closer look at the bus, plenty of seats empty, something I wouldn’t get even if I manage to catch the Volvo. It was my turn now...’ITPL???’ I queried…it was less of a query and more of loud thinking. I hopped in too.

The bus was in a real bad shape, the seats were too clumsy and there was no A/C. But there were two TV's available at the front end which were playing some Telgu movie. There was a huge traffic jam, giving all us passengers the chance to watch the full movie. At first I wasn't interested until I saw Pravu Deva on a wheel chair. Awww!!! Such a waste I thought to myself. It was a movie revolving around some dance competitions and I must say the dances were pretty breathtaking. Prabhu Deva was the guru who had lost his legs to an accident and was training a group (which also included the main lead) to win the dance competition in question. But with the ususal non-sense that any south indian movie serves its audience, there were many such scenes where I went 'What Crap!!!'
Towards the climax, the friends of the main protagonist are kidnapped to prevent them from reaching the competetion venue. The lead is shot in his leg and his shoulders and has to dance aka Basanti to save his friends. Not just he manages to do that, he also manages to dance the competition to the quarter finals, semi-finals and the final, finally winning too. And worse, people in the bus were actually hooting, whistling and shouting while the hero danced his way to glory with bullet shots on his shoulder and legs. Nagarjuna and Chiranjeevi pop in from no where to misuse and abuse the all laws ever made by any physicist.

And the final nail in the coffin...as a token of respect, the lead wants to make his handicapped Guru to do some dancing too. To my utter horror, he carries Prabhu Deva on his shoulders while Prabhu Deva's vaccum pant legs are dangling in the air and they together dance, the lead doing the leg movements and Prabhu Deva doing the hand movements, together doing the Maa-Behen of physics. Newton must be turning in his grave while the passengers in the bus cheered to the histronics.

For sure, one of my best rides to office.

Complexed life

I am getting old.
Lets call it experienced or matured to make it sound better, but it eventually means the same thing...I am getting old.
I am going to be thirty in 3 damned years...that's something man!!! Feels like I was seventeen just a couple of years back, how the hell have the 10 years gone by so quickly.

Now its time to make some serious decisions...
serious??? Now all the decisions taken in the last 27 years seems to be cake walk...choosing between buying a skirt or a jeans, candy or icecream, Homework or TV, engineering or medical, serious relationship or crush-n-bounce.
Sounds really petty stuff...right!!!

Now we have big decisions, big...that could change life forever...one mistake and sooooshhh you go!!!

My age, my experience is also going against me at the professional front.
Three years ago, I felt like a insignificant part of a big company, and just the fact I had a job to hold on to, a kind of job people fancy about was good enough to make me happy and content. Despite of the fact that there were many things around me which I would have liked to change, I learnt to accept things the way they were. But this is a strange stage of my life, where I want to take initiative to go and change things around. But as they say, its easy to find a leader and be one too, but its difficult to find the first follower. Probably in a years time I'd turn into a dumb and deaf figure in the balance sheet of my company...and eventually find my solace.

Phew!!! I have become a serial-cribber...don't you think so!!!

Among all this...there's something to go yipeeeeee about.
I think I am losing some weight finally. The long travel to ITPL everyday, the walking I get to do on the way to office and also the ghar ka khana...looks like this combination is working. My jeans got a bit loose (or has the jeans expanded???) and my double chin is almost gone.

okay lemme just say it....yipeeeeeeeeee!!!!

Hush Hush...!!!

I have a secret...a BIGGGGGG one. One that I am dying to say, but I can't and I won't say it now.
All in good time!!!

And please...I am not pregnant!!!

I am getting old

Late twenties...not so bad i guess.
For some people life starts at thirty...but I seem to be getting old.

I remember during my college days, I was often complemented on my good skin. One pipmle and it showed off as a flashy torch light...and everybody seemed come come and ask 'Hai Hai!!! Tereko pimple ho gaya ???'.

But I feel my skin is starting to rot now.
Time to fight the seven signs of agening...darkess, patchy skin and blah blah !!!

But no Olay for me puhleese, last time I spent 600 bucks on the creme last time and ended up using it for foot massage. It left my face with a string of spots.

To Bhai - On Raksha bandhan

Okay now...this is not the pic of me and Bhai (we are far more cuter....teheeehee), but the idea of putting anything else sounded too cheesy to me.
But the story comes from when we were as small and cute(may be more) as the ones in the pic. I was this innocent younger sister and you were the Kamina walla wada Bhai...you listening Bhai!!!

I would tie a Rakhi to your little wrist and you would hand me the 5 or 10 rupees that Dad gave you for the occasion, while Mom watched and smiled at her sweet duo. And as soon as she left, you would hit me hard and take the money back from me and also take 2 rupees extra as the interest for keeping the money for so long.

I am sorry my Rakhi hasn't reached you this season, I hope it reaches by today evening. But if it doesn't don't get mad at me...consider it to be my revenge for one of the above mentioned occasions. And also to get even with you each time you missed to protect me from Db, when he forcefully switched the TV off finally at 2 O' Clock in the night, or when he refused to buy me one more Tee after I had already bought 5, or when he shouted at me for not taking bath on weekends, or when I refused to take medicines or see a doctor even when I'd be terribly unwell.
I hate you both for that...from the core of my heart. **wink**

I know you have been through a lot this year and earlier too. But now that you are at your road to revival, I wish you get more happiness than you can handle from now on.

Besh Wishes on Raksha Bandhan
From you innocent little sister on her way to ultimate kameenapan.

And this is our pic...you'd agree were cuter. Don't go by his innocent looks...that was just for the camera.

Really???

Its a little late to be blogging on this...nevertheless here it goes.

It was the 13th of August, we had this independence day celebrations at our office. We were requested to wear stuff which were specific to our origins...so I was ideally supposed to wear a Sambalpuri Saree to represent Orissa. But there was something the event managers conviniently overlooked. They sent out the mail only on 12th evening...so that people like me who had blown up to considerable proportions didn't get tome to jugaad the clothes to their currently fitting sizes.
So, no Sambalpuri Sarees for me...and its not my fault either.

I turned up in a routine salwaar kameez, and changed into a saree later in the afternoon.
V is one of our organizers for the event.

V: What kinda saree is that, its got something to do with Orissa???
Me: No, just a saree. For my regional saree, the accesories don't fit me anymore.
V: Oh Okay.

After an hour.

V: You sure, the saree's nothing to do with Orissa?
Me: No, its just a fancy saree thats it.
V: Hmm...we don't have many people from our team who could participate in representing various parts of India.
Me: Hmm

Later that day, during the competetion.
I wasn't obviously participating, so I stood in a corner clicking pictures. Suddenly V notices me and

V: Hey come come.
Me: What???
V: (Pulling me to the judges) And she depicts the modern women of today dressed in a fancy saree.
Me: Hain!!!! (I have better things to wear than a saree to showcase my modenity)
Judges: (Visibly or predending to be happy) Yeah nice nice!!!
Me: Whatever!!!

Guess who is sitting wella today

Rediff news....link

Day care for adults

Db tells me, this actually exists somewhere in Chennai.

Not sure if this is a work of fiction by a notorious male brain.

Updates

I finish 6 months with my current employer today. My confirmation feedback was pretty good but it doesn't matter to me anyways. I have grown over those days when ratings, feedbacks and appraisals meant the world to me. And with this team I am quite hopeless, given the fact that I tried everything possible to bring about the improvements in the team but with no co-operation from the senior level, I got to meet only dead ends. Lets talk about innovations...shall we??? Phew!!!

Bhai has successfully completed 2 months with HCL, and I hope the success continues. With the relief coming from his job, my parents decided to meet the couple at Delhi finally, which would be their first visit to them since their wedding in feb last year. Considering the consequences I had to face when we (me and Db) paid them a visit last year, I found it strange to explain to Mom to behave herself lest she gets into an ugly situation with my SIL. Mom is a simple woman, I know she wouldn't be able to handle it if my SIL loses it and gets remotely close to what I had to face with her. So better she avoids the situation by being careful herself. Yeah!!! times are changing, the MIL has to be careful with the DIL.

In turn, my SIL is gonna come back to us after completing her MBA from Delhi. She'll be here for job hunt. See how time flies!!! Though troublesome is the last thing she is, yet its gonna bring some change in our usual lifestyle. Yet one thing that makes me happy is, because of her arrival, we got a new cubboard and also Db has been organizing the house religiously so that his sister gets a clean and organized room devoid of cables, magazines, bank/ credit card/ phone/ electricity bills being thrown around.

I have bought a new Electronic Keyboard last week, the model is called Casio CTK 700 if you care. So since last 2 weeks I have been playing various tunes, and I am getting good at it with each passing day. Soon I'd be able to upload a few tunes to my blog as well. Db is a real smartie...he likes to play the drums tune on the casio, creates good noise pollution and when its my turn to play my tunes, he hands me the headphones.

Shopped for some 3 jeans at the Lifestyle mega sale, glad to see that my waist has reduced by 2 inches but surprised to find that my weight has gone up by 2 kgs. Is inch loss directly or inversely proportional to weight gain??? Don't ask me...I have no clues...and somehow I have stopped caring too. I am just happy at the moment wearing jeans one size less than my normal.

The Groom Hunt V

Now THIS is the one which worked as the final nail in the coffin.

As I was given to believe, THIS alliance was kept on hold for almost 4 years...i.e. even when I hadn't finished my education. My parents kept avoiding them since they believed I was not ready for marraige, and when they did get interested, the guy was in the US.
I had already met his parents, younger brother, Mamaji, Mamiiji, Nanaji and Naniji. And now that he was back in India, our parents wanted us to meet. Despite of the fact that he was in Bangalore for a couple of days to meet his younger brother who worked here, he didn't come to see me. This was because his parents wanted us to meet in the presence of his family. Weird as it sounds, I had to agree since my parents were quite keen on this alliance.
I had a war of words with my manager to get my leaves approved, so as to make it to Rourkela to meet him.

And finally he came to meet me, again with his parents, younger brother, Mamaji, Mamiiji, Nanaji and Naniji. But the meeting was not half as weird as I had anticipated.

My Father was strictly against the idea of me wearing a saree and carrying a snacks tray to the guy's family. So I was in my room sitting on my computer playinh PCMan when S enterted to meet me accompanied by his Mamiiji (I wondered why they couldn't leave us alone, as if I would bite him). S was smiling and was quite pleasant, he asked me to finish my game, he was not in a hurry...I paused the game nevertheless.
But he was more pleasant than I had thought.
Suddenly all my anger for being called to Rourkela to just meet a guy whom I could have easily met in Bangalore, for which I even had to fight with my manager, was fast vanishing. Looked like it was worth it. I liked the interest he showed in my job and discussed about his own. He was joking on how people think he had a lot of savings since he frequently visits the US, but in reality he spent more abroad and had hardly anything to be remotely called as savings. We spoke about Mumbai, Bangalore, US, his job, mine, our weekend activities, java and business. Not a bit of arrogance, not a bit of ego...or so I thought.

I was impressed to say the least. But as they say, people have many faces.

We kept waiting for their reply for almost a week. And finally when my father called, S's Mum said that they were fine with the alliance but he wanted to meet a few more girls since it seems I was the first girl he had met. I thought that was fair enough though, but I believe his parents were kinda forcing him into it. But eventually they agreed and set up a date for the engagement. I kept waiting for S to call me or mail me but it didn't happen. I was told that his family had also started shopping for the engagement, buying me jwelleries and stuff. But I couldn't get married to him just like that. I had a break up a couple of months ago and I would want my would be husband to know about it, there were a a lot of things we need to discuss which would couldn't have in our first meeting and while his Mamiiji was around...but he never called.
I raised a concern to my parents, but my Father believed that its the sign of a no-nonsense kinda guy...what the hell !!! Nobodody spoke to me...not him, not his parents.

With more updates being fed to me about the arrangements being made for the engagement day, I was getting desperate with each passing day. Its like marrying a complete stranger...I couldn't do that. I asked my Mum to get his number from his parents...but she thought it would be outrageous. There was nothing that i could do.
Bhai came yo my rescue when he said that he hadn't met the guy to whom his sister is getting engaged to, so he wanted to speak to S over the phone. My Mum called up S's Mom to get his number, to which his Mum said that S is not willing to speak to us. It seems he had mentioned that he didn't wish to speak to anybody in my family before the wedding. Since my Mum insisted, she said she would check with her son and let us know.
I could now smell a terribly smelling fish...and so did my Mum.

When she gave the no. of S and a suitable time to call him (as if he were Shahrukh Khan), my Mum took it on her to call him before Bhai does. S spoke to my Mum in his usual pleasant way, but soon after they hung up, his Mum called up accusing us of tricking them to get S's no. and warned us never to call S again. My Mum was agast but decided to stay calm till my Dad returns home. When Dad got to know, he was furious. He immediately called off the engagement making it clear to their family that he doesn't wish to push his only daughter into a well.
They later came back to make amends but my Dad found it difficult to trust them again.

I had had enough by then and asked Mum to leave me alone for a while. Meeting another guy was the last I could ask for.

Hopelessness continues...

The Pizza delivery boy is at the door

Db : Please get the Pizza
Me : Ok
Db : And Pay him too.
Me : **Stares** Okay.

We finish the pizza.

Db: Feel like having an icecream
Me : So get it
Db : You get it na plzzz. Its just around the corner. Take the bike.
Me : Don't you think such requests are normally made by kids to their fathers or by a wife to her husband. Thoda ulta nahin hai!!!
Db : That's okay...but you are my smart, independent 20th century wife.
Me : But who wears the pants in the house???
Db : **Starting at my shorts** Your pants are shorter than mine.
Me : Whatever!!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sipping a fresh lime soda outside Lifestyle in the Oasis mall, after buying 3 trousers in the SALE...

Me : **getting so romantic** Shopping to heart's content, having a refreshing lime soda in such an amazing weather and having you beside me. Aur kya chaiye life mein!!! (What else do you need in life)
Db : Salt...more salt
Me : What???
Db : I need more salt in my drink.
Me : @$@#%#%#%
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Groom Hunt Part IV

And you thought the series was over !!!
Well...continuing....

If all this makes you feel that I had a very stringent criteria for the men, that ain't true. All I wanted is somebody who is sensible and would have no problems with me continuing with my job. But I had no idea that it was such a difficult combination to find.

With the kind of values I was brought up with, the fact that my father brought me up at par with my brother and I have always been treated equally with men was not helping much. Also my paycheck being heavier than that of most men that I met was also not helping, a convent educated Oriya girl who wants to work post marriage was a no-no for most Oriya men. Also my ever increasing weight...these things matter in the arranged market dukaan you see. Though I hold no malice for people who rejected me for being overweight, good for them because ever since the graph has only gone upwards...so anybody who would have married me hoping I could turn slimmer would have been terribly disappointed.
And the irony is, despite of the fact that most guys I met seemed samples to me, I rejected none of them. All of them either rejected me or had me as a backup plan.

I met K through a college friend, K was his lead in his project. K was interested in me when he saw my picture in my friend's album, but initially I wasn't too interested since he was absolutely bald. Later, after a few months, after getting to know a few more things about him, I approached my friend saying I was interested. We chatted a couple of times, and I found him pretty interersting. He was coming down to Bangalore to meet his friends, and we thought we could meet up as well...it was going somewhere. But the very day he was flying to Bangalore, I found out that he was the classmate of my ex, and actually they were pretty good friends.
Complications was the last thing I wanted in my relationship, so I had to call this off. Guilty as charged, I will forever be under the guilt of the wrongdoing. Worse, I couldn't even tell him the reason why I was calling this off...for a stupid ego trip that I didn't want him to know I was earlier dumped by his friend and nor did I wanted my ex to know I was contemplating marraige with his friend.
Anyhow, the loss was mine...he was a great guy.

I met another guy at the Bhubaneswar airport; his father was way smarter than the guy in question. His father was also pretty keen on the alliance.
After the meeting, his father called up mine to say he kinda liked me a lot but it seems his son finds me too smart for his taste...because I turned up in jeans to meet him and not saree or a salwaar kameez at least. Though I like his honesty, at least he didn't site petty excuses like she isn't fair or tall enough or overweight.

But certainly this arranged marriage business was getting more difficult and humiliating.

Mera TV kharab ho gaya

My TV isn't working. This is the same TV that I had got 4 years back with my hard earned money, giving my blood, sweat and tears. How proud I felt when I could buy one with my own money. But the same souvenir of my independence and self sufficiency has finally dumped me.

The initial signs were showing up when Db was in Australia last month. It would suddenly go all dumb, and showed only pictures and played no sound...but then, like a mischevious kid I would hit it once hard on its head and it would come to its senses. The symptoms went serious when even the slap on the head stopped working and you needed to reboot the TV to get its audio working.

But since last night that has stopped working too.

Db is a happy man now since he hates TV and the small and old portable TV in the bedroom or youtube easily provides him the news and stock updates.

I can manage for a while with the portable TV or by playing the sound on the portable TV and watching the pictures in the drawing room TV (The TV in the bedroom is smaller and of not that great picture quality...and yes I am that desperate), but I need a replacement for the drawing room TV ASAP.

The trip to Goa Part II - Terra Paraiso

Terra Paraiso is the name of the resort we were put up with in North Goa.

Though staying there was more of an impulsive and desperate measure. Our stay at the holiday in was planned for only three days, the original plan was to move to the North and find a good resort near the Calungute beach. But since I could hardly enjoy the Holiday inn due to the complexities that feminism brings in, we were actually contemplating to extend our stay here. Finally, almost as an impulsive decision we decided to move out, and with no access to internet, we made a few calls to makemytrip, who promptly arranged the above mentioned resort for us.

But the decision was not so bad after all.




The Terra Paraiso is situated at the heart of north Goa, hardly 2 kms from the Calungute beach, and 6-7 kms from the Aguda fort and similar distance from a few more happening beaches around. The pool was amazing and ours again was a pool facing room which worked in a lot of ways. The rooms were way more spacious than ones in the Holiday Inn and Ah!! they had a jacuzzi too, but didn't find the jacuzzi effect anything out of the world. But the service was quite okayish and food was bad. Contrary to Holiday Inn, here we seemed to be one of the oldest couples. There were a few honeymoon couples around, who used to sit in the corner with candlelights during dinner time.


Though I found those candlelight dinners very chirkoot...but considering that they were just babies compared to us, may be they couldn't afford a grand one. Okay now...who am I kidding!!! Forget grand or chirkoot, I never got to have a candle light dinner myself, and before you starting poking your finger on to Db saying 'how mean!!!', it isn't his fault...I find all this too cheesy and mushy and Db already knows that a die-hard romantic is the last thing I am.

And there were a two such couples who were here for some fun...you know, college kids who are going around and want to catch some fun together without telling their parents. How did I identify them !!!???Come'on...these are the couples who you can find everywhere in the resort, trying to get close and cosy, since this after all is their chance they spent the money for...while they address each other as 'tu', clap and hug at the drop of a hat.


Here there were many people who were as underdressed as me, but we still have a problem here. Most of the girls had a wonderful figure to show off and were at least 3-5 years younger, and 2-3 sizes down to me, so I looked like an Auntie jiski jaawni dhalti hi nahin. Okay now, Db is tired...I'll stop cribbing.

Once we hired a bike there, life became simpler and far more enjoyable thereon. We visited many of the famous beaches in the days ahead and had really great time. All the beaches were
amazingly picturesque...more on them coming up in the next post. But I am still looking for the person who said Goa is a cheap shopping place...Bangalore is far more cheaper. or may be they sell things costlier during the off season. I have just got myself a few stolls and one bag.

Trip to Goa Part I - The Holiday Inn

A trip to Goa during the off season is not a really bad idea after all.
My vacation could be called a mixed bag. Considering that me and d Db are so different on our views on how a holiday ought to be, this holiday had something for both of us. We got ample of time without office and cool our heels while the last few days of the vacation we also managed to go around the place and visit a few places.

As we reached the Madgaon station, I was starting to feel terribly disappointed. It was raining badly and also because, for a place known to be a
major tourist attraction not just in India but worldwide, the Madgaon station was smelly like an armpit. It was also Bharat Bandh on the same day, and the idea of spending 12 hours in that smelly railway station was giving me goosebumps. But thankfully Holiday Inn decided to send us the pick up cab to the resort which they had initially denied because of the bandh. As we started cutting through the narrow roads towards the resort, my disappointment level was increasing by many folds. For a place which attracts many foreign tourists through out the year, I was expecting a more commercialized place. There were no rickshaws, no petrol pumps in the radius of 20 kms around, the roads were so narrow that it would make it difficult for two buses to cross each other, the town buses looked ancient...my Grandfather's village looked so much plush compared to this. Even Db's hometown Jeypore is also much more scenic than this, if marketed properly, it would do much better than Goa.

Such an over hyped place I thought...

The first three days of our vacation was pre booked at the Holiday Inn Resort in South Goa. It was raining cats and dogs when we reached there. The resort was nice, they had an amazing pool and a private beach. Our room was very cozy and comfortable and also pool facing...it was amazing to just sit in the balcony sipping your tea and watch the pool or the sea. The food was amazing, we had the buffet b'fast, lunch and dinner included in our package and we had a great time with the food that was served to us. With the food at the resort, I found my long lost taste of homemade curd...so much so that I am actually in the process of making it at home now.

I was earlier told by my friends that I would probably look terribly overdressed in Goa, since there would be many who would hardly be wearing anything at all. But we seemed to be the youngest couple in the resort (most of them were with one or two kids, or middle aged couples or corporates who had come for conferences) and with my shorts, I looked like the most under-dressed person there. I had got hardly anything from Bangalore that could remotely match up to the sarees and salwaar kameez or the full length jeans with long kurtas that other aunties were wearing there so I remained the most under-dressed person around.
Also, I was not keeping well (the regular women stuff)...and I was not expected to keep well for the next 3 days as well...so all I could do is watch people having fun from my balcony. Though it was not as bad as it sounds, but I could still do better by jumping into the pool or the beach. Though Db got his chance to have a quiet and relaxing holiday away from office, the fact that I was not enjoying didn't give him any pleasure.

So, on the second day of our vacation, we decided to hire a bike and check out the Palolem beach. I am still looking for the person who told us that the beach is just 20 kms away, since it was almost or more than 35 kms from our resort. And as luck would have it, the seemingly bright sunny day turned into a ghastly rainy one and we drenched ourselves on the way to the beach. Worse, the beach was lonely as a desert with only filthy dogs to give us some unwanted company. Disappointed to the core, we left the place in a few minutes. But the worse was yet to be...as we were returning back in the rainy afternoon, we lost our way and got a lot more wet and frustrated than we otherwise would have been. We reached our room by evening, and eventually decided to forget the beaches and enjoy our stay in the resort by using the internal facilities given here.


At the end of three days we had the option to either stretch our stay in the same resort for the next three days or move to North Goa. We chose the second option and booked another hotel from makemytrip for another resort in North Goa, near the Calungute beach. Then was the fear for the unknown when we checked out of the Holiday Inn and booked a cab to the north.

Luggage...I hate it !!!

When I was single, travelling home was not a teary affair for me unlike my other friends.

They would start preparing a month earlier by buying stuff for their family, piling them on the bed and not bothering to pack them into suitcases until the day of the journey comes...and the final result would be two pregnant looking suitcases for which hiring one coolie would look inhuman. On the contrary, I has something which looked like a schoolbag which I carried home. For a one week vaccation, It would have 3-4 T-shirts, my lens kit and may be a facewash, and some snack if I am being too generous. My roomies would look shocked each time(probably carrying more luggage than you need is a girly thing) and made sure they ask their parents to add to my luggage. So most of the time, my return trips were over burdened, my own luggage being just one fourth of the total luggage I'd be carrying.My worst ever experience was when one of my friend's Dad wanted me to carry a Rajai for his daughter to Bangalore. I showed him the size of my bag and he gave me this strange expression and offered me to give a bag too. But somehow I managed to wriggle out of carrying the Rajai.

The bottom line is I have always hated to carry luggage, I feel a huge luggage spoils the journey, half with the effort it takes to carry them and other half by worrying about it on the way.

But post marriage, the tables turned. Now each time I go to my in-laws place, I need on suitcase only for myself while Db has to make his own arrangements in another bag. For a one week vaccation, I need to carry five salwaar kammezes, a couple of sarees, bangles, gifts for the family and a teeny weeny makeup kit. Though my luggage is still far from looking like the pregnant bags of my friends, but they are still enough to irritate me.

Now this is a very novel feeling to me.
We are going for a week long holiday to Goa this week (yipeeeeeee!!!!). Thats one place I have always wanted to go. Also this is our first vaccation in 2.5 years of our marraige, I wouldn't call the Delhi trip as a holiday. I started my packing yesterday, and I have already packed eight Tees, two shorts,two slacks and two skirts and the bag is already half full while I still have a plenty of things to pack the essentials, the toileteries, my swim wear, my jeans, camera and need to leave some space for the shopping in Goa too.
Never felt so full.

BTW, we are staying in Goa for a whole 5 days and would be staying at the Holiday Inn. Howzzat!!!

Truth is stranger than fiction

The wake of the news of many models comitting suicides, provoked the thought of this blog post.
I know a lot of people who would die for the money and fame that these ladies were enjoying. Then why, a person who supposedly has everything in life would be drawn to an edge where they want to end their life. Agreed, showbiz comes with its set of challenges and pressures, but every profession has its set of challenges, each life its own set of problems.
I read somewhere where a fellow model has comented that, the fashion industry takes a lot of compromises, casting couches to reach at the top, and when you are not able to sustain it at the top that results to depression and eventually such drastic steps. My question is if something is so important for you to achieve that you are willing to tread the path full of nasty compromises, then you have no right to complain whatsoever...and aren't you a fool to believe that the fame and sucess will last a lifetime for you. So, you got to have a Plan B...right!!!
And why trouble his boyfriend for this. She chose to end her life after a fight, or breakup or whatever, why should he be blamed for that...makes no sense.

As I was given to believe, it seems films influence peope and the societe, everything starting from fashion, smoking, extra marital affairs...everything influences people. But reading more about the film and fashion industry, I feel their lifes is way more filmy than the movies they are a part of.

Did you know:

Hema Malini chose to marry the very married Dharmendra, but Dharmendra's wife was not willing to divoce her husband. hence they managed to escape through a small gap in the Indian Legal system, by converting into Islam.

Sanjeev Kumar never married because he was in love with Hema Malini who in turn chose to marry the married and father of two kids, Dharmendra. The then Actress Sulakshana Pandit wanted to marry Sanjeev Kumar but he kept refusing her proposal since he could never get over Hema Malini. Sulaksha Pandit in turn never married too.

MadhuBala died of a hole in her heart, the most common disease shown in movies during those times. She hid her ailment for a long time from people until she succumbed to her illness. She had an affair with Dilip Kumar and both wanted to settle down, but they had a rift over a court case where Dilip kumar chose to testify against MadhuBala's father, hence standing by what he thought was right. But this caused a drift between the two and she chose to become the second wife of Kishore Kumar instead.

Meena Kumari was abandoned by her parents when she was born but later brought back by her father. She died due to liver failure because of excessive drinking, post her divorce with Kamal Amrohi. It is said that she was as pennyless on her death as during her birth, there was no money to pay for her hospital bills.

Parveen Babi is supposed to be schizophenic, before she met her tragic end, another common subject choosen by many masala movies till date. read more...

Nargis was born to a courtesean but was kept away from music and dance to prevent her from landing into the same profession. She fell for Sunil Dutt when he saved her life in an accident (a common practice in Bollywood movies to woo a girl) during the making of Mother India and soon they married.

Guru Dutt chose to end his life after a failed relationship with his wife Geeta Dutt and Waheeda Rehman. The had also made two failed attempts earlier.

His wife Geeta Dutt died soon after suffering a serious nervous breakdown, she ran into financial problems and started performing at lower platforms like Durga pujas and other stage performances. She died of liver failure due to excessive drinking.

Asha Parekh never married because of a failed relationship, and because she believed her unapproachable personna repelled people to ask her for marraige.

I was unknown to most of them before I dug into it...and certainly I realize that all that glitters is not gold. The glittering glamorous world of fashion is cinema is probably dark and hollow within...and certainly what we see recreated on celluloid, happy pretty faces...dancing and cheering might be going back to a dark lonely life as soon as the lights are turned off.

Truth is certainly stranger than fiction.

Hopeless !!!

Me : Do you believe in mushy love stories?
Db : (makes a dismissive gesture while still looking at his laptop, which means 'No' for an answer)
Me : So do you think I was a fool to believe that I would some day have a magical love story to call my own?
Db : No not really. Hota hai!!! (happens)
Me : You know I always thought I would some day have cindrella kinda love story. I saw in some movie, the guy leaves the girl in the station, and while he is walking out he realizes how much he loves her. He turns back and starts running to stop the girl. But the train has already started moving, so he runs after the train with all his worth...but misses it. Frustrated, as he returns back, he finds the girl waiting on the platform. She didn't board the train because she believed he'd return to get her back.
Db : (Still looking at his laptop) Okay.
Me : You know, I always wished it happened to me.
Db : Hmm
Me : Would you run after the train to stop me?
Db : No, I know you would be waiting in the platform, so I'll walk.
Me : Hmph!!! Okay, say we had a fight and I went to my Mom's place...phir???
Db : I'll send a return ticket to your Dad and ask him to put you on the next train back.
Me : He wont do that.
Db : (Smiling) He will. Trust me
Me : (now irritated) he wont, he wont, he wont!!!
Db : Okay then, in addition to the return ticket, I'd insist that your Mom also comes to the station to recieve you.
Me : And how does that help?
Db : She'll anyway pakaofy you so much on the station that you would snatch the return ticket from your Dad and jump into the next return train.
Me : Whatever !!! **Hopeless guy**
Db : **Evil Grin**

The day I thought Jesus smiled at me.

It was a dull rainy evening when I started from office.

But I love the rain and unlike normal people who'd like to stay back for the rain to ebb, I like to drive in the rain. Also, Db was in Australia then and there was nobody waiting for me back home...I'd never get this chance again once he's back, he wont let me drench in rain. I must take this opportunity, but the only problem was the day being a Thursday and I am supposed to visit the Church. So if it starts raining more heavily on the way, I'll be stuck.

Anyhow, I decided to go for it.

While I had hardly crossed the Old Madras Road, it started raining cats and dogs. People stared parking their bikes at one corner of the road and taking shelter in nearby bus stops. The road was almost empty now, with only a few four wheelers here and there. I got down to wear my raincoat, the one that I lovingly call 'Master Deenanath's Raincoat'. I remember the day I started driving, Db had given me this raincoat and I went 'eeks!!! its so tacky, looks like straight out of some museum. I'll look like an grumpy Aunty wearing this.' . But when has he ever listened to me!!! The very day I was carrying the raincoat in my bike's storage and in a few days wearing the same in the rain. But God bless him, 'Master Deenanath's Raincoat' works like wonder in the rains.

I decided to continue driving, because the sight of the crowd waiting at the road side gave me a huge scare...'imagine the jam when all of them will hit the street when the rain stops'.

It was raining all the time, the rain drops whipping me across my face. My trousers are all wet now, so are my shoes, so is my bag. But I still continued, the empty road was a huge encouragement. I reached the ejipura signal, by then the rain had ebbed. I contemplated for a while...shall I go home, change, freshen up and start afresh, or do I go to church, finish up there and go back home and chill for the rest of the evening.
Since the traffic was pretty less and the rain has slowed down, I decided to take up the second option and took the right turn towards VivekNagar.

As soon as I took the right, it started raining cats and dogs again.
Ouch !!!...
I am already too wet to care for the rain anymore...but at least my bike is getting the much needed wash in the rain. I could see the smile coming on my face.

Damn I was skin wet when I reached the church. I reached the church parking, the security handed me a parking slip, which immediately turned into crumbled powder as soon as I took it my wet hands. Quite a lot of people waiting inside for the rain to come down including one couple who were waiting right where I parked my bike. I remember them because the lady smiled at me when I was making up my mind where to keep the crumpled parking coupon to prevent it from further damage.

I stepped out of the parking to a surprised crowd and proceeded to buy candles. The vendor was herself hiding from the rain when I came to her stall and said '4 candles'. She gave me the candles and a sympathetic smile, I gave her an enthusiastic one.

I proceeded towards the church main door to almost a hundred spectators who were waiting at rain secure places and were visibly amused to see a round shaped woman (no girl) in tacky Raincoat waking lazily in one of the heaviest rain that Bangalore had seen in a while, and at the top of all that smiling too. I reached inside and lit my candles and stood there still smiling at Jesus and eventually took the same path back to the parking to find the same couple still waiting right where I left them. The lady smiled at me as my bike's engine roared to life.
At the parking exit I handed over the crumpled remains of the coupon to the security with a two rupees coin and crossing the rest of the waiting crowd, I drove away to glory in the still heavy rain while I thought Jesus must also be smiling at me.

Finally, I reached home...drenched from head to toe in ice cold rain water and my clothes sticking to me like second skin but somehow still amused.
As I changed I helped myself to a cup of coffee, I thought to myself, if this doesn't please Jesus what will.